Wanna know the first thing I did when I walked in the door of my house, after the power was restored, and after thanking the heavens above?
Cleaned.
Yep.
That’s right.
I cleaned the whole house from top to bottom.
Before I unpacked.
Before I took a shower.
Before I ate any food.
Before I even updated my Facebook Status.
I cleaned.
Cleaning has always been cathartic for me, especially when I feel totally out of control, or when I am in super-high-strung-panic-mode. And if there was ever a time I truly needed to clean, this was it.
After unpacking, finishing the laundry, and making all things sparkly fresh, my son and I began the hunt for food. Obviously everything in our refrigerator had expired. And after living on frozen Pizza and Halloween candy, for six days in a row, we were pretty desperate for a solid meal.
However, finding something to eat proved to be a lot more difficult than I expected.
As we drove down the highway, it was unsettling to see so many houses and businesses still blacked out. Some traffic lights were still totally non-functional, others had been knocked down to the ground, and the rest just blinked yellow. I don’t think I have ever been so happy to see a Red traffic light, upright, working properly.
We tried several different restaurants, only to find they were closed, or still without power. Police officers patrolled the parking lots for potential looters. And I was beginning to feel as though this is what life would be like after the Zombie Apocalypse.
I didn’t want spend too much time driving around in the car in light of the gas situation. And by “situation” I mean the gas supply New Jersey is very limited. And the little amount that is available is being rationed out via some numerical odd/even system that I don’t really understand, because my plate ends with a letter, and mostly because I don’t understand anything mathematical, whatsoever.
And who the hell wants to wait on this line?
We were just about to give up, when we decided to make a left, instead of a right onto another highway. And much to our surprise everything was lit up like Las Vegas.
“Oh, hell yes!” My son shouted. “Lights! People! Cars!”
“Eureka!” I yelled back while making an illegal turn because I couldn’t pull into the strip-mall fast enough. “There has to be food in here!”
Of course, it took ten minutes for us to find the only vacant parking space. But once we parked the car we hauled ass into the Chinese restaurant.
“Can we get a table for two?”
“Take-Out only.”
“Can we at least see a menu?”
“No beef. Only chicken.”
“Um, how about eggrolls.”
“No. Just noodles.”
With our stomach rumbling we ordered the only option on the menu and then I handed her my Visa card.
“Cash only. No machine.”
“Oh.” It hadn’t occurred to me that debit/credit card machines wouldn’t work, even though the power was back. And I usually don’t carry any cash. “Um… What’s the total?”
“$18.00.”
I looked in my wallet but I only had $10.00.
“Shit!”
I turned to my son and suggested we try going to Walmart because maybe they would accept credit cards and maybe they would have some food that we could cook back home. And I was dressed appropriately. And by appropriately, I mean in my pajamas.
“Wait!” My son checked his back pocket, “I have ten bucks too!”
“Sweet!”
As we walked back to the car with a bag full of Chinese greasiness I grabbed my son’s hand, “Dude, this is like real life Survivor, yo.”
He replied with perfect comedic timing and a rap song, “Cash rules everything around me. C.R.E.A.M get the money.”
“Dolla dolla bill y’all.”
Dolla dolla bill, indeed.
We decided we would still go to Walmart because it was right across the street. And it probably wouldn’t be packed because it was so late. And we should pick up a few things to have in the house so we wouldn’t have to play ‘Scavenger Hunt’ in the morning for breakfast.
Now, anyone who’s ever shopped at Walmart on a GOOD DAY knows it’s a lot like ‘Night Of The Living Dead.’
And this was no exception.
But at least Walmart accepted debit/credit cards.
We grabbed a cart fully prepared to clean out the store. But I didn’t Hula Hoop, like the last time I was there, because we were on a serious mission.
We went up and down every single aisle, in search of necessary staples.
Milk? Nope.
Eggs? Nope.
Cheese? Nope.
Bread? Nope.
Bacon? No way.
90% of the shelves were completely empty.
Damn!
Fortunately, they did have some frozen foods.
[*insert maniacal laughter*]
Seriously.
We bought that.
And one package of Toaster Strudel®
On the way to the register, we grabbed a few toiletries, like shampoo and deodorant so we wouldn’t smell like dirty mokeys. And I was smart enough choose “cash back” – because I had just learned a valuable lesson about always having paper money on my person.
When we arrived home, we stuffed our faces and our bellies with Chicken Lo Mein, until we passed out under MSG induced comas.
And speaking of comas…
The next day, after my parents came home from my Uncle Ricks house, and after socializing with my friends for a few hours at my favorite club, commonly referred to as KHCC, and after ingesting the greatest Bacon Cheddar Cheeseburger of all time….
I slept, and slept, and slept, and slept. I slept as if I had mononucleosis. Like for 20 hours. I didn’t even smoke a cigarette, much less read any blogs.
It’s safe to say, that I am feeling a MILLION times better. In fact, I almost feel new. And I am 100% ready and willing and able to dive back into NaNoBloPo & NaNoWriMo.
And I still haven’t missed a single day!
BOOM!
PS: Since we’re still pretending I am George Lucas, by posting my story about Hurricane Sandy, in reverse order, like Star Wars, I am happy to announce that Part One, Two, and Three will be shared next. And in that order.
So glad you’re home and safe and sound! And that picture of you with the duster is too adorable! Cheers and I hope things get cleared up there soon!
I am soooooooofa king happy, Marty.
Is this thing on?
Everything appears to be working?
At least no zombies were actually trying to eat you. How crazy!
YAY!
Thanks, June.
I guess the Internet is just sick of all my posts? Probably.
And I am super glad I was not attacked by any Zombies.
Okay, first I have to say….that photo of you as a little girl is BEYOND precious!
OMG…you’re ADORABLE!!!!
“Cleaning has always been cathartic for me,”
I’m the same way, I kid you not. If I’m ever upset about something, I clean, because it helps focus and calm me. Must be a Libra thing, hu?
“And I usually don’t carry any cash.”
Me neither, girl. I LIVE off my debit card.
As I was reading this post, I was thinking to myself….holy shit, I can even imagine going through what you and others went through last week during that hurricane. I am soooooooo glad you finally got power restored and that you’re finally home!
((((( You ))))
I’m hoping that this nor’easter we’re getting tomorrow and Thursday is mild.
*fingers crossed*
X
Half of the towns in NJ are being evacuated as we speak. Hopefully, I am NOT in the line of fire, this time.
I am ALREADY freaking out and trying to prepare for the worst. But it’s kinda tough when even the stores are OUT OF FOOD.
Oh well.
Please pray for the best!
And thank you for your lovely comment.
And cleaning = works miracles!
XOXOXO
I know, this totally SUCKS, doesn’t it?
But I have a feeling it won’t be NEARLY as bad as last week.
Yes, I will definitely pray for the best!
((((( You )))))
XOXOXOX
You’re the best!
You too, girl!
X
Mel, I am so over the top glad to hear you are back home taking care of business. If you got that much energy to clean up, please head down here. We could do with your Mrs Clean approach and I can promise you a room of your own (no couch crashing).
But, seriously, we’re elated you are safe and back home, even if it looks like something out of the Walking Dead. We’ve had a few storms down here like that where the post storm activities look like something from the Apocalypse. During Rita a few years ago, everyone left town, there was no gas to be had, the stores were all ransacked, nothing was open. We stayed in town to ride out the storm (no real damage) and I went to Wallyworld for some last minute supplies. The ONLY thing left on the shelves was cans of hominy – it seems that NOBODY wanted that stuff.
Afterwards, the only restaurant in town that was open was our local Chinese chain (Timmy Chan’s) and they had a line that was a block long. The family running that store was making a killing that weekend. Glad you are safely home and survived the Sandy saga. Now hunker down and hold on for the next wave. We’ll keep a candle burning for you guys.
“Ahh, you get nun frum cowum A, an nun frum cowum B”. And I love some Toaster Strudel. I’m glad that you’re rested and smelling fine, in a nice clean house, while burning up the keyboard, awaiting the Zomble Apocolypse.
Thank you so much, Agg.
It’s really weird seeing the stores all cleared out like this.
And yes, we’re trying to brace for the upcoming storm that will likely hit tonight into all day Wednesday & last until Thursday.
Also, thank you for making me laugh out loud for real when I read this:
“The ONLY thing left on the shelves was cans of hominy – it seems that NOBODY wanted that stuff.”
PS: Hurricane Sandy PART ONE will finally be live tomorrow!
🙂
AhaHAhHHahHAhHAHA!
Thank you, Jimmy!
Wow. Those pics of NJ are incredible. Sad to see, but I’m incredibly happy that you’re home!! Sounds like it may be a while before things are totally back to normal though.
I suppose there are worse things than Hot Pockets and Toaster Strudels. Hominy comes to mind. 🙂 But sheesh, if KHCC is open for business, why would you need to eat anywhere else?
Yay! I am SO GLAD for you that you’re home. Cleaning? I would expect nothing less from you!
“And I was beginning to feel as though this is what life would be like after the Zombie Apocalypse”
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! Yes, I can imagine. Just seeing those traffic lights still down on the road is enough to give me the idea, because they like to get those things up and running ASAP, don’t they?
But wait … there is LETTUCE in that cheeseburger, young lady! I thought you wuz allergic!! I hope you removed every last shred before munching down on that!
I was THRILLED when KHCC opened on Sunday!
I was so hungry for “real” food.
Of course, Jay!
I took off the lettuce, tomato, and onion.
And I didn’t eat the bun either.
But it was still delicious!
I knew you would clean first and I totally get it!! Ah, yes, the valuable cash lesson. But, wow, no eggs,bread or milk yet?
Yesterday some stores had more food.
YAY.
But there’s a huge storm rolling in again.
And we didn’t see the need to restock everything just in case we lose power, again.
HOPEFULLY that WONT happen.
I’m pretty sure I’m not even reading your Hurricane Sandy posts in the proper backwards order, since when I fall behind, I read your posts in backwards order. But it doesn’t matter. I’m still following.
Hot Pockets. Oh my. These are desperate times, indeed.
I love you, Terri.
Thank you for reading my posts AT ALL!
It does sound like the apocalypse. Creepy to drive through neighborhoods without lights and that gas thing would freak me out. My car and I are BFFs.
I am jealous about the toaster strudels though. Haven’t had those in years and the only way I could justify the calories is if nothing else was available.
Oh these calories are TOTALLY justified!
I’m glad that things are back to normal. I cannot imagine how bad it was where you live.
Brutal, Nik. Just brutal.
I could never have gone through this with your good humor. I would have murdered someone. But then at least the jail might have had power and food. You have my deepest admiration. 🙂
I was ready to give my self an allergic reaction, just so I could go to the hospital for power & internet!
I suppose jail would have worked, too. But the hospital — much better choice. 😉
i don’t know anything you said after cleaning. i’m all glassy eyed now. i cleaned and organized too while there was no tv/internet/cable. my closet and drawers are tight again.
not my literal underwear but where i keep my drawers. the drawer. did i spell it right?
Hooray for organized closets!
Ahahhahahahahahah! Yes.
LOve the shot of little you with the duster. Glad you’re back home!!!!!
Thank you. It’s wonderful to be home!
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Wow, Meleah. This is absolutely great … you make me feel like I’m there. It seemed so remote from here in California, almost like another TV show. Thanks.
You’re welcome.