Keeping It Real

The other day while driving my car, I caught a glimpse of myself in the rear-view mirror. Now, I don’t know if it was the way the sunlight hit my face, or the fact that I’ve been up all night, almost every night, writing. But whatever the case, the wrinkles around my eyes looked much deeper than they normally do. And I could pack a week’s worth of luggage, complete with hot-rollers and hairdryers, in the bags under my eyes. And, I made the mistake of mentioning this to my 15-year-old son, Justin.

Here’s how that conversation went down:

Me: “Wow. I really look old today. Don’t I?”

JCH: “I have two words for you, mom.”

[insert pause]

JCH: “Olay Regenerist.”

Lovely.

* Does anyone else have suggestions for under-eye wrinkles and bags?

About Meleah

Mother. Writer. Television Junkie. Pajama Jean Enthusiast.
This entry was posted in Driving, Family, Humor, JCH quotes, Life, Writing. Bookmark the permalink.

93 Responses to Keeping It Real

  1. Anonymous says:

    I think you’re too hard on yourself.

  2. I think you’re being nice, MWJ.
    xoxo

  3. Dr. Cynicism says:

    I suggest booze and a day long spa retreat.  And don’t let anyone say you can’t, because I’m a doctor and I just wrote you a script.

  4. Shieldmaiden1196 says:

    I’m a big fan of hydration, moisturizer made for the eye area (I use Avon Reversalist but there are lots of good ones and they are all probably pretty much the same), and snazzy glasses. Also: Maybelline Age Reversal concealer. Is it really Age Reversing? I have no idea. Is it an effective concealer? You betcha.

  5. I have no suggestions except possibly suggesting your son learn how to lie to women about certain subjects (just sayin’).  Maybe less writing and more sleeping?

  6. moooooog35 says:

    I have a great skin care remedy but I’m pretty sure this is a PG-13 blog so, you know, email me.

  7. FUCK. YES.

    You’re the greatest doctor of all time!

  8. I hate concealer.
    It always seems to make my wrinkles look even worse!
    Hell, I don’t even use foundation.

    But I am all about new moisturizer!!

  9. Linda R. says:

    Sleep, reduce stress, a good face cream, and a glass of red wine (antioxidants for your skin). 😉

  10. Oh yes.
    He certainly needs a lesson in How To Lie To Women!

  11. Oh, I think I know what your remedy will be!

  12. PERFECT!
    Thanks, Linda!

  13. Lemon Stand says:

    He really should meet our daughter Rachel… She’d chew him up and spit him out…. heh!  What a lovely thought.  🙂

  14. I think the two of them would end up as BFF!

  15. Nora Blithe says:

    I know I’m supposed to be funny but there is nothing funny about wrinkles so forgive me for echewing funny.  I heard that Boots Number 7 is the ONLY moisturizer prove to reduce wrinkles.  I’ve used it ever since.  So far so good for me.

  16. Lemon Stand says:

    HA! Only if the Universe is truly perverse would he be saddled with us for in-laws.  You’ve only had a tiny PG taste of what our household is like!  :p

  17. Lemon Stand says:

    Oh and BFFs? I’d get an egg timer if I were you to see how far each one gets til armagedon. 

  18. YAY! Thanks for the tip, Nora!
    And really nice to * meet * you!

  19. I would LOVE to be part of YOUR family!
    Because mine’s pretty crazy too!

  20. Lemon Stand says:

    If your family is like mine then:
    a. everyone talks with their hands and if you duct tape them behind their backs, they can’t talk coherently…
    b. everyone has an opinion and has the right to razz anyone who doesn’t agree (with humor) often and relentlessly…
    c. there are no empty bathrooms in your house… and if there are… then you don’t want to even be in the house without opening the window, turning on the fan, closing and locking the door and don’t forget a door stop to cover the door crack… just sayin’
    d. you don’t trust your greatest fear with anyone in your family without suffering from what I think they refer to as aversion therapy… everyone will get you everything available that possesses in some way this phobia…  (gotta love my family)  🙂

  21. Nora Blithe says:

    You too!

    —– Reply message —–

  22. “YES” to ALL of them! OMFG!

  23. cardiogirl says:

    Those lines are giving you character, missy. Just say no to Olay.

  24. What with all the swelling I go through in a day, I’ve started using this Garnier under-eye roller thing with caffeine in it! So far, so good. But ice packs and those cute little cuke slices work, too. I won’t tell you to get sleep, because that would make me a hypocrite.

  25. I like that CG. I like that a lot.

  26. I actually JUST bought that Garnier under-eye roller thingy!
    I hope it works for me too!

    🙂

  27. All I can pass on is that moisturizing your innards with beer does not help. Dang it!

  28. Sandra says:

    Oh Honey! If I knew how to get rid of those bags under my eyes, I’d be bottling the secret and selling it! A good foundation? Under eye concealer? I have no idea!

  29. I have NO idea either!

  30. Oscar says:

    I had a similar experiance.  My daughter recently mentioned that I look tired.  Not feeling that way at all, i looked at myself in the mirror and have these bags under my eyes. 

    I was in Florida at the time so my daughter took me to a mall and we got L’Oreal eye Defense.  I used it for about 2 weeks now and se a noticable difference.  Someone from Puerto Rico whom I haven’t seen in about a month mentioned I look good. ( a rare comment) 

    Ah, but I’m sure you’re still beautiful as well…..

  31. Anonymous says:

    Good lord, your site  must not like me very much.  I’ve been trying to comment for 5  days from two different computers and it won’t take my input.  I had to run off to Belgium to get my two cents in…. 🙁        (BTW – for the record, I hate people who use emoticons)

    Now that is one smart ass little chip off the old Meleah block.  Not sure if i would applaud his insight or slap the crap out of him.  I guess the nut doesn’t fall very far from the tree.  Remember, Mel, you only have yourself to blame.  As I have told my son (more than a few times), I brought you into this world, I can take you out of  it…

    And those aren’t bags under your eyes.  They’re wisdom lines  befitting your knowledge and experience.  You might remind young JCH that a few of those lines belong to him…
     

  32. Thanks, Oscar!

    Leave it to our kids to tell the truth!

  33. Awwww!! AGG!

    I’m sorry my blog is being “mean to you”.
    I’ll see if I can have my tech-friend take a look, to see if there’s a problem.

    I’ve decided to ” applaud his insight” – because the way he said it was actually very funny.
    And I am totally blaming these lines ON HIM.

    I hope you’re having a lovely time in Belgium!

  34. Anonymous says:

    I am constantly on the hunt because I seem to have perpetual bags under my eyes. Like enough baggage to travel around the world on a steam voyager bags. If you figure it out, please let me know.

    🙂
    Traci

  35. “Like enough baggage to travel around the world on a steam voyager”

    Ahahahhahahahah!

  36. Selma says:

    Your son is so like my son. I have had a similar conversation. Too funny!

  37. Jules says:

    lol why does your son know about that? ? 

  38. Anonymous says:

    If you find the answer please let me know. Funny you noticed that in the car though, I daren’t look at myself in the car mirror anymore, it’s very unkind, either that or it’s the only truthful mirror in my life!

  39. The rear view mirror is BRUTAL!

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