Let’s face it. We all have fears. Some are justifiable fears. And others? Not so much.
As most of you know, I am absolutely terrified of Spiders, because I’ve already told you that story. And, as most of you know, I am petrified of Bridges, because I’ve already told you that story too. But, I am not sure if I have ever shared my crippling fears with respects to: Fire, and, Public Speaking, and, Heights, and, Flying?
Let’s start with Flying. Shall we? Seriously people, I need to take a Xanax just thinking about boarding an airplane. Don’t even get me started on the story that involved: extreme and violent turbulence, causing the oxygen masks to drop from the ceiling, and the luggage to fall out of the overhead compartments, which led me to think WE’RE ALL GUNNA DIE, because I believed at that very moment gravity could reach right up, grab a hold of my plane, and rip me from the skies. And how one man’s chronic halitosis inevitably sent me into uncontrollable heaving and hurling for a seven-hour flight. Let’s just say it wasn’t pretty. And I kissed the tarmac when we finally landed safely.
When it comes to Heights? I suspect this particular fear has something to do with the day my younger brother Adam convinced me to get on a roller coaster, and one that had no floors, and proceeded to spin me upside-down, until I threw up. Which was really unfortunate for the man sitting directly behind me. Because my vomit? Landed all over him. To this day, I practically suffer from a case of vertigo if I am higher than three feet off the ground.
Now, I can’t really explain where this next fear comes from, but I can assure all of you, if I ever had to Speak In Public? I would faint and collapse. And, there wouldn’t be enough voltage in this world to electroshock me back into coherency.
Which brings us to my last fear.
My fear of Fire stems way back to my childhood when I was about five or six years old. Now, I have never been in a fire. [Thank God.] Nor have I even been close to a fire [outside of a controlled environment]. But for some reason, I have spent my life overly concerned with the threat of a fire. And I have no idea why.
When I was a little girl, before I could go to bed, I packed up all of my favorite things and placed them neatly inside of a milk crate. And, I am not even joking when I tell you that I slept holding onto that milk crate full of my beloved items. I performed this ritual every single night – just in case – there was ever a fire and I was forced to run out of the house. I had to be fully prepared to save my most cherished belongings.
Maybe my fear of impending fire comes from all of those ‘Smokey The Bear’ commercials that used to be on television? Or maybe it’s because of all the ‘Fire Drills’ we used to have in school? Or maybe, I am just weird?
But whatever the reasons may be, I am STILL extremely cautious when it comes to an open flame or anything remotely fire-related. And it’s kind of becoming problematic.
I don’t like to leave my bedroom when my candles are lit, because I automatically imagine a huge gust of wind will magically blast through my room and somehow tip over the candles, and ignite everything. Of course, this has a very little chance of ever happening. But that doesn’t stop me from blowing out all of my candles every time I leave my room, only to re-light them upon entry. And I do this, even if I am just going to the bathroom. [Did I happen to mention my bathroom is conveniently located all of three steps away?]
As a smoker [and as someone who is afraid of fire] I am perpetually compelled to make sure my cigarettes are completely extinguished. I do not smoke inside my house, but I do smoke in the garage. Because yanno, it’s a whole lot ‘safer’ to smoke cigarettes while sitting next to paint cans, and chemicals, and All Things FLAMMABLE. And of course that makes me extremely nervous. As such, I don’t trust leaving any cigarettes in the ashtray. Instead, after I smoke, I carefully wrap each cigarette butt up in aluminum foil. Because that is the only way I feel comfortable leaving the garage after having smoked.
The other day, after smoking a cigarette, I couldn’t find any tinfoil. I searched high and low on a mission to locate even the smallest scrap of aluminum. I rummaged through every single cabinet and kitchen shelf. Sadly, we were totally out of tinfoil, and it was far too late for me to take a trip to the store to purchase new. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find any other trust-worthy product to wrap-up my cigarette butts. I simply had to leave my cigarette in the ashtray.
And even though I knew with utmost certainty my cigarette was thoroughly extinguished? That didn’t stop me from running back to the garage every fifteen minutes to make sure my cigarette didn’t spontaneously start to smolder. And, that my garage was not ‘Engulfed in Flames’. I could not stop my wild imagination from conjuring up worst-case-scenarios. After incessantly ‘checking’ for two hours in a row, I finally realized that if I just flushed my cigarette butt down the toilet bowl, there was no possible way my house would set on fire. At least not from my cigarette.
So now that ya’ll think I am totally out of my mind, before I start feeling like I am the ONLY crazy person on the face of the earth, please tell me…
“What are some of YOUR fears?”
Ok but only for you…
I am terrified of fireworks. Really.
Once when I was 4- a bunch of my dad's pot head friends lit a whole side of a hill on fire shooting off firecrackers.Then a few years later we went to a professional show and some of the crap fell out of the sky on me.
Ok- so basically I hate the 4th of July, Chinese New Years and anything other event that has fireworks.
Glad to hear I'm not the only one that keeps things handy in case of fire. Of course, for me, I also have worries about tornados and floods.
You shouldn't leave any fire unattended when you leave a room, not even candles. Sure, a lot of people do, but it's a bad idea. You could get those battery-operated candles. They look like the real thing. I bought one a few years ago, and the newer ones are even better. The old one flickers like a flame, but the new ones flicker and are shaped like a flame. Win-win.
I have a habit–learned from my mother–of putting out matches in water. Never throw them away unless they've been run under water. Or tossed in a jar of water. Maybe you could do that with your cigarettes. Just get a jar and fill it halfway with water. Toss the cigarette in there when done. For extra protection, put the lid on (preferably metal). Then, you won't have to go through so much aluminum foil.
I would feel the same way about fireworks if I was you! That IS scary! [And, thanks for playing along love!]
When they invent battery operated SCENTED candles I will be in heaven! I like your jar idea. I might look into that!
I'm quite scared of fire as well.. There was a flat fire just about 50 yards from mine last week, it was totally gutted. It made me feel awful..
My biggest fear since being burgled just over a year ago is being burgled again, I'm not sure I will ever fully recover from that.
Lady:
Oh I remember when that happened to you. I don't think I would ever get over that either.
I am afraid of Heights (And Brown Bears, but that's a bear of a different color) but heights of a particular kind. I was not afraid fer instance, when I took flying lessons. I was 3000 ft up and (the instructor) did aerobatics where you end up with the plane almost upside down and you head plastered against the glass canopy looking straight down at the earth. This did not bother me. But, in the past (the Mesozoic era) I did side jobs on weekends and such, construction, roofing etc. If I had to stand on a roof 20 ft high I would feel like I had to fling myself over the edge to the unfeeling concrete below.
ps You prolly know this already but…. its not so much the liquids that are flammable but the fumes. Hope this helps ;>)
pps my nom de plume is JoeSixPack53 and SoLow LIKES it when I harass him !
I'm afraid of showering AND head lice.
Every day is a battle.
If I listed everything I was afraid of, it would be a book. But at the top has to be enclosed places, crowds, fire (my Aunt died in a fire with two of my cousins when she fell asleep smoking a cigarette), flying and natural disasters. (so far I have been through earthquakes, hurricanes, typhoons, volcanic eruptions, tornadoes, ice storms and blizzards) So glad to know I am in good company! :O) (btw I can't find your email but mine is in my profile. Drop me a line.)
hahahah. this was funny, but i'm not laughing at you. your writing is humorous. my fears? butterflies. i will run and swing my arms like i'm in a playground fight to get away from them.
um death. cause it's so freaking boring to be in a pine box with no internet connection. i don't want to wake up dead one morning. it's a wonder i even go to sleep. if i stay up, then i can't die. ah ha death, gotcha!
Definitely heights and speaking in public! I got dizzy watching Avatar because I felt as if I was actually going up up and away!
At this point in my life I can't say any of my old fears are still on active… most of them are gone and in good part due to living through some character building times. I had this terrible thing against wasps – due to a swarm attack as I was 4 years old or so, but then again *I prodded* the hive at grandpa's ranch so it wasn't their fault to begin with; now I respect those flying things and co-exist in a rather well behaved way.
I used to have this fear of snakes slipping into my room. I fear spiders too but only big ones. I also have this fear of not being able to do the right thing. I fear thunder & lightning. I also fear death for my loved ones but strangely not for me.
Hi! Just wanted to stop by and say thank you for dropping by my blog earlier. Nice to meet you.
Hey…this a faaabulous post. And I say that because so much of what you shared I can identify with. OMG..flying being the worst for me. Just the thought of having to get on plane freaks me out. I'm also a smoker and so understand your perpetual need to make sure your cigarette is extinguished. Sometimes I 'll even walk back into my apartment on my way to work to double check. It would probably be easier if we didn't smoke, right? Nah!
Closed spaces. Not clostrophobic, but being in tight spaces. – Busy highways. I'm safe but are they…
But I'm more worried about your impending OCD.
Flying – LOL Like driving except I get to sleep more.
Heights – Just don't go where its not safe. I'd ride on a rope from a blimp!
Fire – Wel I don't smoke. Candles are in jars, screens are in front of the fireplace. And a fire extinguisher.
I'm just careful.
Well I was gonna offer you a trip to an island where we could sit on a mountain and eat fresh lobster cooked over a fire…
Damn! LOL
Ah ah! Hi, JoeSixPack! Nice to *meet* you! You took flying lessons? That's awesome. I could NEVER handle that! Nor could I ever stand on a roof! I can't even look out the window of a hotel room that's over three stories high without getting dizzy!
AHAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHhahHAHHHAhhah
OMG. You've been through all of those disasters? Where the heck do you live [*wants to make sure I never move there!*]
Thank You VAL! I tried to write this in a funny tone, but I keep feeling like my words are falling flat these days! Im glad SOMEONE found this post remotely humorous!
“um death. cause it's so freaking boring to be in a pine box with no internet connection.”
Ahahahhaaha! that cracked me up
Yeah, I get dizzy seeing other people handling heights in movies too! YAY, I feel less-crazy now!
You're lucky to have resolved your issues with fears! Yanno whats really strange? When I was a kid all the way through my twenties, I wasn't truly SCARED of anything. I mean [except for fire]. But, I had NO FEAR. I hitch-hiked cross-country for heaven sake! And now? I am SUCH a baby and petrified of everything!
Snakes and Spiders are totally super creepy and scary!!
Hi Ron, nice to *meet*you too. I found you through Valerie's PhotoBlog! You did an awesome spotlight on her!
I'm glad you can relate! It's always reassuring to hear you are not the only person who obsessively checks to make sure your cigarette is completely out! Ahahhahahaha. Yes, it probably WOULD be better if we didn't smoke, but that's not happening anytime soon! And flying? UGH! Its awful! Just AWFUL!
“Well I was gonna, offer you a trip to an island where we could sit on a mountain and eat fresh lobster cooked over a fire…”
Now that would have been nice! Too bad I'd be too scared to enjoy myself!
🙂
I guess I should mention that I was a military brat and later active duty
air force for 10 years. I was born in Japan. Lived in Germany, Maryland,
New Hampshire, Maine, Massachusetts, Colorado, Florida, Mississippi, Texas,
and Guam. I have been to Spain, the Philippines, Austria, and at least
2/3rds of the lower 48 for either vacation, school, or military duty. So I
guess it's not so much WHERE I lived, more like the fact that I am a
disaster magnet… At least that's what my FIL tells me. 🙂
Except for bridges I have the same fears as you. Although the biggie for me is flying. I have to get shitfaced before I get on a plane or I have crippling anxiety attacks the whole ride. Another fear is that I'll forget to turn off my space heater and that will cause my building to burn down. Even if I know I've shit it off, after I lock my door I always have to unlock it and check it again. OCD 101!
My greatest fear as well is fire. I think that fact that so much lost is not retrievable is what gets me. The potential for loss and non recovery is scary. Pictures and items that cannot ever be replaced. Living in Earthquake country that is nothing to me compared to fire. In the Northridge quake everything just fell and crashed but those things near and dear to me were fine. Fire not so much. I have even mapped out in my head room by room what I would grab in case of a fire as well as an evacuation plan in case I am upstairs. I do have a very detailed list and video of the house and contents that I keep with my parents just in case.
Ah ah! Well, that makes sense having TRAVELED the world over, you would be subjected to so many disasters like those! Goodness!!!
Marty:
OCD runs my life! ahahahahahhaha
And yeah, flying = torture!
Fire really IS sofa king scary! I also have all of the videos and photos I would HAVE to save – ready to go in a big box, just in case of a fire! And, considering I've been known to sleep with my computer, I am always ready to run out of the house with it!
I'm almost as goofy as you, I even sometimes have to return home to make sure I close the garage door…duh…are we all a little nuts?
Hugs Dorothy from grammology
grammology.com
AH! My father does that!
Well, when I used to smoke, I too would be overly paranoid about my cigarette butts reigniting. I am deathly afraid of heights, and I cannot STAND public speaking, though I can pull it off if absolutely necessary. I'd say our fears are pretty similar. I think the fire fear has something to do with control issues, or feeling like one has no control, or …needing to be in control. One of those options, I'm guessing. xoxo
Fears–they RULE my life. One of the reasons I hate summer so much is my fear of wasps, hornets, bees, etc. Surprisingly, I don't think any of my fears are out of the ordinary. Snakes, heights–at 5'1″ I'm STILL too far off of the ground–water, spiders–well, bugs of ALL kinds, cause they're creepy–VERY loud noises. I guess the most unusual one is really an OCD thing–I absolutely worry that we will run out of food before I can get to the store. If I don't have 4-6 cans of every canned good I use in the house (for example), then I'm 'running out' of said item. If there is a HINT of a possible snow storm coming, I'm at the store stocking up so we won't be without food. And I could actually start my own grocery store with all of the stuff I already have in stock. Weird, yes, but when the girls were young, I NEVER had to worry about money being tight in January. 🙂
My oldest has two strange fears: Clowns and those Easter Bunnies that are featured in malls at Easter time. She avoids shopping as much as she can at Easter, because she says the bunnies are 'out to get her.' 😀 No skipping a generation on strangeness in THIS family.
I don't like fire either, I go as far as not lighting any candles anywhere in the house. Like you I don't really have a legitimate reason-but still, I'm always worried about something catching on fire.
Good Guess! And yanno that whole fires can result in DEATH thing. That might fuel my fear a little!
I agree with you. All bugs ARE totally super creepy. And, some of them look prehistoric which freaks me out even more!
Oh man! My mom is just like you! She stock piles canned food, and water, and batteries, and all kinds of 'life support' stuff. We could totally get snowed in for WEEKS and not run out of a thing, and yet every time we are at the grocery store she buys MORE because we NEED it.
Oh snap! I totally forgot to mention my FEAR of CLOWNS. And, ever since the movie Poltergiest, I FREAK OUT whenever I see any kind of doll that even resembles a clown!
Maybe? I am totally paranoid. That MUST be why I am nuts! But at least NOW I know I am NOT alone with my craziness!!
I'm afraid of the pending zombie invasion. You may laugh, but it is a looming threat.
I keep a pepsi can half filled with water next to my smoking chair out on my balcony… I slip the cigarette into the pepsi can, and only when I hear it “Fffft” will I go inside. I can so relate to your tin foil obsession. I change out my pepsi can daily.
My biggest fear is vomit. I'm not a fan of fire, but I obsess WAY more over the prospect of someone vomiting, than I do fire. I'm sure that makes me horribly weird.
Found you through Bindi's and RC's page. Interesting reading so far. 🙂
I concur!
Hi May! Nice to *meet* you!
I like the sound you hear when slipping a cigarette into a soda can.
That noise is all I need reassure me WERE NOT ALL GUNNA DIE!
And, you are so NOT weird!
Thanks for participating!
🙂
Oh girlfriend, what are you gonna do when your book gets published and you have to go on a big book tour, replete with readings and signings and such???? I suppose drugs will help?
Oh, you're not out of your mind! We all have irrational fears, I think – I know I do! I'm afraid of my house burning down too, and there's no way I'd get all of my cherished possessions into a milk crate. My fear of fire made me insist that we bought a fireproof safe, so that at least the essential paperwork for house and insurance and so on would be safe, and my address books and my most cherished Johnny Depp memorabilia and the dogs' records and so on. I'm sure no other private residence in England has a fireproof safe the size of ours. It would take three or four men to lift the damn thing, but I had to have it.
And by the way, you need to keep a jar of water in the garage for your butts. Just dunk them in there and leave them floating. They can't set anything alight like that, now, can they?
you're afraid of Bridges? which one? Bo or Jeff? Bo scares the shit outta me….
Ahahahhaahha! I might have to lean heavily on Xanax!
I LOVE your fireproof safe! That is freaking fantastic! And, now I *must have* one!!
Ahahahahahahhaha! Jeff Bridges definitely!
I'm glad to know that someone else considers it a threat. I'm at zombie fracking ground zero, too — I'm like .10 of a mile from a cemetery.
I used to be afraid of all of those things but since I have kids now I have no fears anymore. I should have been more afraid of the rabbit dying.