NO BUTTS

Is the FIRST year I will truly attempt to quit smoking (for real.)

I have cut down, from 20-30-(sometimes even 40) cigarettes a day …. to around 5-10 cigarettes a day….but I have never agreed to let it go completely, until now.

I have been a smoker since I was 11 years old. I have been smoking for a total of 21 years.

So much of my smoking is out of habit. The second I wake up, I light up. While having my morning coffee, SMOKE. As soon as I get out of the shower, SMOKE. While putting on make up, SMOKE. While waiting for the rollers in my hair to set, SMOKE. As soon as I get in my car, SMOKE. As soon as my phone rings, SMOKE. Right before and right after each and every meal (including snacks) smoke smoke smoke smoke. After a post, I re read it and SMOKE. After I finish a chapter in my book, smoke. If I am stuck on a chapter in my book, SMOKE. While at work, as soon as I finish an account I was working on, SMOKE. (you get the picture)

Smoking is so much a part of my life I cant really imagine not smoking. I don’t know if I can do it.

Even though there is a part of me that really does want to quit, there’s another side of me that does not want to quit at all.

But, I at least I have to TRY… even if I fail, I have to TRY.

So, here’s a picture of the LAST CIGARETTE I ever smoked:

I am hoping with the help of THIS product (see below) and many many xanax (to stop the inner and outer urges to SCREAM obsenities) constant chewing gum, and I heard somewhere brushing your teeth alot helps make the craving go away faster.

I’m trying right now….to get through day one. Here’s hoping!