Once upon a time, there lived a girl named Meleah. And at some point during the year 2003 she bought her very first set of big girl bedding, complete with a silk duvet cover and accenting throw pillows. Gone were the days of futons, and mismatched sheets, and stained comforters. She had thrown those out along with her self-destructive lifestyle. She was working as a full-time commercial insurance professional, and she was a full-time single mother. Meleah had grown up. And she felt like she had arrived. And she finally owned the appropriate bedding to prove it.
Meleah loved that bedding with her whole entire heart. And not just because the duvet cover represented how far she’d come in life, but also because it was really, really, really pretty. And shiny. And new. And yet somehow, it still managed to showcase her wild personality.
Meleah took extraordinary care of those sheets, and pillowcases, and accent throws, and her duvet cover. So much so that she became horribly obsessively compulsive about keeping them absolutely flawless. She diligently washed them once a week, only using the delicate cycle, before steam ironing them so everything would lie seamlessly upon her glorious new bed.
At night, while tucking herself in, she would wrap herself up, only to feel swaddled inside the cozy comfort of 2,000 Thread Count Egyptian Cotton Sheets. The silky smooth pillowcases caressed her tired face. And the duvet cover provided a utopian level of climate control. She was never too hot. And she was never too cold. She was always just right.
Sadly, without any warning signs, in 2005, Meleah became sick. And then she grew even sicker. She spent countless days, and countless hours, inside waiting rooms, and hospitals, and doctor’s offices, forever dressed in a paper gown, being poked, and prodded, and tested. She endured years of humiliating medical procedures and suffered from extreme side effects due to medications. And that’s when her only sanctuary became the confines of that very bed.
As such, Meleah became more and more fixated on keeping her bedding in a state of perpetual perfection. Her incessant need to fluff, and fold, and reposition the pillows, wasn’t just because she could never afford to replace them, but mostly, because while she was falling apart on the inside she really needed things on the outside to remain as beautiful as possible.
In 2008, Meleah was officially diagnosed with Crohn’s Disease and severe Food Allergies. She had to leave her job, and her fabulous condominium, because her silly little immune system didn’t work anymore. Luckily, her beloved parents were more than happy to take her and her son into their home.
So, Meleah begrudgingly packed up her essential belongings, and she gave away most of her worldly possessions. But, she held onto those sheets, and pillowcases, and accent throws, and her duvet cover, because she just couldn’t bring herself to relinquish them.
After Meleah settled into her parents’ house, she became even more obsessively compulsive, with cleaning, and organizing, and keeping her bed immaculate. Because sometimes in life there are things you can’t control. And other times in life, the only thing you can control is the way you make your bed. And Meleah took that concept to a whole new level.
She spent over an hour, every single day, making her bed perfectly. Why? Because the duvet cover had to fall evenly on both the left and ride side of the bed. And the seam line at the bottom of the duvet cover had to be absolutely straight. And there couldn’t be any wrinkles on the sheets. And the accent throws had to be aligned with the stars. And god-forbid something was out of place; she would have to unmake her bed, and start all over from scratch.
[And yes, she’s painfully aware that makes her totally insane.]
Once she finally made the bed properly, no one in the house was allowed to sit on it. Or breathe on it. Or walk too closely by it. Because Meleah would totally freak out if they did. And any time a visiting guest, unfamiliar with the rules, entered Meleah’s tiny purple bedroom and sat down on her bed, she proceeded to have mini internal panic attacks. Because Meleah knew the only way to remove their ass-print from her duvet cover, meant she would have to unmake, and remake, the whole bed, all over again.
Because the duvet cover had to fall evenly on both the left and ride side of the bed. And the seam line at the bottom of the duvet cover had to be absolutely straight. And there couldn’t be any wrinkles on the sheets. And the accent throws had to be aligned with the stars. And after a long day at the doctor’s office, or at the hospital, the last thing she wanted to do was fix her bed, again, especially after she already spent several hours making it look primo in the first place. But, because she’s a crazy person, that’s exactly what she did.
And this unhealthy obsession with her bedding, and how her bed was made, went on for years, and years, and years, and years.
Until one day, in 2012, when Meleah was late for yet another appointment, because she couldn’t leave the house until her bed was made right. But, the duvet cover wouldn’t lay flat and it wasn’t even on both the left and right side. And the seam line at the bottom of the bed wasn’t straight. And the sheets were wrinkled. And the pillows weren’t aligned with the stars. All of the beautiful colors had faded. And everything was filled with holes and rips, from being washed one too many times. And there was nothing she could do to fix it.
Covered in sweat, and riddled with anxiety, Meleah looked at the tattered remains of her bedding when she suddenly recognized just how ridiculous she had become. And then she wondered why she was still holding on to these sheets, and pillowcases, and accent throws, and that damned duvet cover, after NINE years, because they no longer represented all she had worked for. In fact, now they merely represented everything she had lost due to her Annoying Medical Conditions. And as much as she tried, she couldn’t possibly add up how many hours of her life had been wasted on simply making her bed, or worrying about someone sitting on her bed, or fixing her bed after someone touched it, mostly because Meleah sucks at math. She can’t even add 2 + 2 with a calculator.
And that’s precisely when Meleah decided she had enough. She’s driven herself way too far into crazyville. And it was time to get a grip.
Determined to change, Meleah ripped off those sheets, and pillowcases, and accent throws, and the duvet cover. She wadded them up into a ball, and she threw them in the garbage. As a wave of relief washed over her, she felt as though as if she’d been freed from some form of self-imposed slavery.
Finally.
She took a deep breath and gazed around her bedroom.
But now what?
Meleah grabbed her purse, and her keys, and jumped into her car. While driving to the store, she promised herself she would only buy the simplest of bedding she could find. But, of course, it still had to be alluring. After all, she spends most of her time inside her tiny purple bedroom. And if she’s going to be gawking at the same things all day and all night, they better be beautiful.
After perusing the aisles, and finding nothing really all that special, she momentarily considered buying one plain white flat sheet, and one plain white comforter. Except that white stains too easily. And also, it resembles that of the inside of a mental institute. And while Meleah probably belongs inside of a mental institute, she really doesn’t want her bedroom to look like one.
And then suddenly Meleah spotted a very lovely comforter. And that very lovely comforter came with two matching shams. And next to that very lovely comforter with two matching shams, were two sets of super-soft sheets that blended exquisitely. Without any hesitation, Meleah quickly loaded up her cart, and skipped on over to the register.
When Meleah arrived home, she couldn’t wait to try out her brand new bedding. But, she had to wash everything first, because that is totally normal. And after everything was Downey Fresh, she was ready to make her bed anew.
She put the sheets on the mattress, she put the shams on the pillows, and she put the blanket on the bed. And then she stood there staring at it. She wasn’t sure if she liked it or not. She definitely did not LOVE it. Not like she had loved her old bedding. And she started to get upset.
Really upset.
Almost to the point of tears.
Meleah couldn’t figure out what was wrong with her new bedding. At least not until she realized, that while yes it IS very lovely, and pretty, and purple, and matches her bedroom, maybe it was just a little too delicate.
And anyone who knows Meleah knows that there is absolutely NOTHING delicate about her. Everything about her is loud. Even her whisper is more like a yell. And she can’t tiptoe down the carpeted stairs in her house without sounding like she’s tap dancing.
And Meleah cannot have a bed that doesn’t represent her personality because she thinks that’s dishonest and misleading. And since we’ve already established that she’s a crazy person, it should come as no surprise to hear that she went back to the store in search of ways to make her bed look more like she acts.
And nothing screams as loudly as she does, quite like an electric purple shag throw pillow, and matching electric purple shag throw blanket.
Once again, Meleah stared, and stared, and stared, at her bed. But something still wasn’t right. Something still seemed a little off. So, she moved the pillows this way, and she moved the pillows that way. Then, she flipped the blanket onto the reversible side, and then she flipped it back again. She tossed the electric purple accents in this direction, and that direction. And when that didn’t help, she stopped herself, because the last thing Meleah wanted to do was make her bed all kinds of complicated. Especially since that’s exactly what she was trying to avoid.
So, she went back to the store.
Again.
And this time, Meleah didn’t even know what she was looking for, when she accidentally stumbled upon the most heavenly blanket, on the face of the planet. Not only would it match her bedroom, but the incredibly soft texture would also provide the ever-so important-climate-controlled-swaddling that she absolutely requires for a decent nights sleep.
Score.
Meleah came back home, again, and then she spent approximately 167,902.3 minutes rearranging the new and improved contents of her bed, over, and over, and over, and over when she accidentally made yet another incredible discovery.
Meleah noticed the way her new bedding looked the most charming, and cozy, and pretty, and wonderful, was when she did NOT make her bed AT ALL.
What? !!!
That’s right.
Because it looks totes amazeballs, super messy.
And now?
Meleah doesn’t have to have internal panic attacks anymore. And she doesn’t have to waste countless minutes, hours, days, and weeks, trying to fix her bed, or worry about someone else wrecking her bed, because it doesn’t matter if the comforter doesn’t fall evenly on both the left and ride side of the bed. And the seam line at the bottom of the comforter doesn’t have to be absolutely straight. And there can be wrinkles on the sheets. And there aren’t any accent throws that need to be aligned with the stars, and it doesn’t matter if her bedding gets all jacked up, because even when it does, it still looks totally-super-pretty.
And, the people inside of her house are allowed to sit on her bed. And breathe on it. And walk really closely by it. In fact, her mother already dove on it. And her son already jumped up and down on it. And her brother and her nephew already played on it. And her father already tripped over it.
And Meleah didn’t even flinch.
Because Meleah never, ever, ever, ever, has to make her bed, ever again!
And that’s how New Bedding changed One Woman’s Life.
* So tell me people…
Do any of you suffer from crippling OCD? Or wrestle with serious control issues?
i never make my bed.. NEVER!! it is all black except for six union jack (in fuchsia) pillows.. i love it,, it’s totally “me” and since two of my three dogs are black even i can’t see the dog hair!!!! i am so not OCD!!!! maybe a little of that obsession you had with perfecting your bed would be better served if you mailed it to me!!! xxoo
okay there’s so much i want to say here i don’t even know where to start. i was totally reading the beginning of this post like i was reading one of my books when it got to the good part. cough. my mouth was open, empty stare, head cocked to the side and i even heard myself swallow. i appreciate your OCD because i’m right there with you. while the sheets don’t have to be perfect, i need the bed to be just so. lines need to be straight if any, pillows lined up, etc. i won’t remake a bed, but if for any reason it was not made that morning i have to make it before getting into it. (though my obsessing went out the window after i had surgery because i was in the bed so much, it NEVER got made. i’m better now tho and back to making the bed daily).
and you’re so smart, i just got 7 seconds of free therapy right here: because while she was falling apart on the inside she really needed things on the outside to remain as beautiful as possible. um, i’m going to go cry now. that’s what the freak is wrong with me, i’m a mess inside so i have to make sure things are just right on the outside. leaving the $10.00 co-pay under your pillow.
off topic: you know we could start our own organizing business. i cannot stand a mess and try not to freak out much if things are not just so. my mom said she would let me help her clean up her place. i think she is a hoarder in training. i literally have to create another personality just to look at some of the stuff she has. who needs 500 coffee mugs. we’re going to have a yard sale, put our stuff together and get rid of excess. less IS more.
anyhoo your bed, former and current, looks great. did you notice that when i came to your house, i stood outside of your bedroom and held up the door frame. i never go into a person’s bedroom, ever, unless invited and i know you would not have cared, but still, respect the space. i want do not cross yellow – police – tape across my bedroom door frame.
i guess it’s good to let go of some obsessive behavior but i couldn’t help but scream noooo, meleah and hold out my hand to you as you spiraled down the i don’t have to make my bed hole and i’m okay with it. i wanted to grab you back to the OCD bed maker but i suppose that was a bit too much time into it. okay i understand. i don’t spend that much time making my bed, but maybe organizing other things.
i would go on and on, but i need to cut my nails, hard to type now. maybe just a tad too long. buh. but first i’m going back to read the good parts of this post. throw this post in the bloggers hall of fame. enjoyed!
now i want new bedding. hey i know this place that has 7 piece sets for reasonable prices. breathe v, breathe. well i was thinking about getting new bedding anyway, but dang if the desire just didn’t increase hundredfold. i’m going to get off your blog now. hangs head low, but with the left eye slightly open, peeks at this post one last time.
LMAO. That story made my night. I always thought that so-perfect looking bed looked like a lot of work, now I see I was totally underestimating it. I’m so glad your feeling better about your bed. See what a little retail therapy does for your soul. And, it’s still appropriately purple.
I love you woman. 🙂 and I like that the next time I visit I can chill on your bed and know you aren’t freaking out inside, because after knowing you for decades, I totally *did* know you were freaking out inside. Now about that closet hanger spacing….
There is so much of this I understand. My life changed drastically in 2001 and I have done some strange things too, in order to hold onto me or some semblance of me. I thank goodness those very close to me get it. A little side note, the pink comforter, you are going to love, my kids fight over it when they are home LOL
I have had a long standing relationship with my Smokey and the Bandit comforter…so I understand… 🙂
Meleah, this post CRACKED ME THE HELL UP!!!!
I don’t know whether it’s because we’re both LIBRAS, but I so identify with every single thing you shared here!
I am sooooooooooooooooooo OCD! Everything has to be in order in my apartment or it dives me nuts! I’m especially OCD about my bathroom; cleaning it sometimes THREE times a week!
Love the graphic you shared about CDO instead of OCD. HILARIOUS!!!
Great post, girl!
X
P.S. btw, I love that little chair you have sitting next to your bed.
Oh, Meleah. This post just rocks! I rarely make my bed, because I just don’t feel like it. That’s a pretty lame excuse , but it is the truth. My mother always insisted that our beds be made up (still does). Her reasoning had to do with the fact that people might come over and see how messy your bed is. That just never made sense to me. Good for you for being comfortable in your own space!!
Oh Jodi!!
That bed really does sound like you!
Valerie!!!
I just wanna squeeze you right now and give you the biggest hug ever.
The OCD is really all the about the lack of control.
Especially when health issues are are so FAR OUT of your control.
And I am super glad you understand more about what’s going on with you after reading this.
And I wondered WHY you didn’t come all the way INTO my bedroom when you were here.
Now I know.
And the next time you’re here please COME IN MY ROOM
And also, I’m still a LITTLE twitchy about my bed not being 100% perfect. But I just can’t keep torturing myself.
I mean, I spent NINE years obsessing over a blanket!
🙂
One word for new bedding: TARGET!
Of course it had to be purple!
Hello!
Oh, the closet hanger spacing!!
I still can’t let go of that!
Damn you, Cascade!
And I love you, Leslie!
xoxoxo
And I miss you.
A lot.
Lucy,
It’s weird how the brain works.
Once I lost control over my health,
I couldn’t stop myself from obsessing about everything else.
I’m just glad I will NOT be spending several hours a day making, or fixing, or worrying about, my bed.
🙂
Oh Ron,
I am so glad you can relate.
And when I had my condo, I totally cleaned the bathrooms three-four times a week.
FULL BLOWN OCD STYLE.
For some reason, living here, because the house isn’t MINE, I don’t feel the need to do that anymore.
But I am a complete FREAK when it comes to my tiny purple bedroom. It’s the ONLY SPACE I have control over. So I am way serious about it.
Ha!
My mom was the same way when I was growing up.
In fact, I was not allowed to leave my room, until my bed was made. Plus, I went to a crazy boarding school, where you also weren’t allowed to leave the dorm unless your bed was made.
Clearly, I’ve had LONG STANDING issues with bed making.
37 years later, I’m DONE with that noise!
This is a great post!
I make my bed every day and I like it to be even and as neat as possible BUT If, for some reason, it isn’t perfect (like the cat was asleep on it while I was making it, so I couldn’t put the usual effort in) I don’t fret about it. I straighten it up when I next go up there – Which could be at bed time. I guess I’m not OCD then 🙂
BTW. I think your bed is very pretty 🙂
Great post and I loved the OCD/CDO picture! Truthfully though, are you trying to lure Prince into your bedroom?
Thanks, Babs!
And no, you’re definitely NOT OCD if you can leave your bed messy!
🙂
Oh good god, NO!
You are crazy in the most delightful, adorable way. I totally get the control thing, but I never applied it to my bed. I just went around making everyone around me want to bitch-slap me to Bermuda. I do make my bed every day though. Since I live in a one-room cottage, it wouldn’t do to have people come in to an unmade bed right smack in the middle of the room. And I like it made up now, too. But now you’ve got me thinking about a new duvet! Hmmm… 😉
Oh, I’m crazy, alright!
But thanks for saying I’m adorably crazy.
And also, if you decide to get new bedding, I highly recommend Target. Really nice stuff and rather affordable.
Hey Meleah! My first trip here, and you’ve story-slapped me into next week. This is a huge tale, and I can’t imagine it was an easy one to ‘fess up to. I get the OCD thing – taking control of something just to take control of SOMETHING – tho I’m pleased to say I get it in a mild way and generally life is pretty shiny these days. I’ve popped you on my blogroll so I don’t miss out on future adventures! Thanks for your support this week on my ongoing 30 DAYS OF ROTH =) Indigo x
And yeah, NICE bed now!
I don’t exactly have OCD, but I used to be a major control freak, and wanted things JUST RIGHT. Well, with four kids, a dog and a cat, things don’t always go JUST RIGHT. It took me a long time to admit that I would need to give up control on what the house looked like, how the wash was done, how the dishes were loaded, etc, but when I finally did… what a relief!! And now I couldn’t give a sh*t what the house looks like. Okay, that’s not true, but I don’t get as upset as I used to.
Anyway, way to conquer your OCD! At least in the bedmaking department! 🙂
P.S. I love Target!
Wooot!!
I will be adding you to my blogroll too.
And I just added you on Flickr, Twitter, and Facebook!
🙂
Thanks, Shadow!
It really is a HUGE sense of relief to NOT give a shit about my bed, for ONCE in my life.
meleah, i can’t even afford target. this is where i shop: boscovs.com. the link is to the bedding department.
http://bit.ly/NAnIx4
________________________________
“But I am a complete FREAK when it comes to my tiny purple bedroom. It’s the ONLY SPACE I have control over. So I am way serious about it.”
And I don’t blame you girl, because I would be the same way!
X
okay, go. cyber hug. ((( )))
yeah that was pretty deep and according to your reasoning, i’m REal messed (not my first choice word) up inside, cause i need order on the outside like nobody’s business.
okay next visit, i’m sitting my big ole butt on your bed. hahaha. and i’ll be all scared about it. i do stop people at the door when they try to enter my bedroom. like whoa, slow your roll people and back that thing up.
you could make beds for photo shoots. i never tire looking at photos of neat things and your bedroom looks like magazine work. i really do want to open a “i will organize your crap for you business.” i’d be in my glory.
I love this post and am totally not OCD, and don’t make the bed every day. The cats don’t mind and maybe prefer it messy. At bedtime I do straighten the covers and pull up the sheets and blanket so that they are somewhat even on both sides, fluff my pillow and climb in. If I think someone might come in and see it, I do make the bed.
I did get tired from the effort you put forth in making your bed. I am surprised you’d mess it up enough to sleep in it. 😉
I love that OCD should be CDO!!! I recognize that I am very OCDish and I like everything in it’s place but what I will also say….and this is important…I don’t judge however anyone else wants to do anything. If I had spent as much time in my bed as you have, I might have torched it by now. I haven’t walked in your shoes.
So as much as I love having my house “just so”, I am just fine visiting any and all…no matter what their house is like…doesn’t matter.
Oh okay!
I love that you * get * me so well!
If you open that business, I’ll join you, come to your clients houses, and I’ll make their beds like magazine covers!
Oh, I used to sleep SO still because I didn’t want to mess up the bed. I would literally be uncomfortable so the sheets wouldn’t get wrinkled.
How screwed up is that?
🙂
Oh, I’m the same way.
I don’t care what other people’s houses look like, or if they are messy. But my room has to be just right.
And everything has it’s own ?spot’!
A great post today!
My question is, if you are OCD and Dyslexic, are you then DCO?
wow. beautifully told!
OOOOOOOhhhh! Boarding school – well that explains everything!!! I went to a school that had boarders, but I was a day student for 10 frickin years…same girls for 10 years…same yuk!
AhahHAhHAHhHAHAHHAH!!
Thank you!
Yeah, boarding school was CRAZY.
I was 3,000 miles away from home and didn’t even see my family for the whole 1st year I was there!
One day, I really have to write a book about that school.
But AFTER I finish the one I’m already working on!
🙂
You know what I’m most impressed about? You cured yourself of your making the bed obsession. Way to go. The new bed is fantastic. Love the colours. Love everything about it. Love that you are so strong that you can do anything you put your mind to. Brilliant!
Thank you, my lovely Selma!
xoxoxo
Meleah, your ability to be painfully honest and funny at the same time is remarkable. I think your stories may touch me more than most because of the life my son leads, mostly in his room, so I know that it’s less funny than you make it. I wish new bedding could change his life.
Thank you, Bud.
Thank you for that compliment.
It means A LOT coming from you.
And, I’m sorry for all that your son is going through.
* hugs *