Feeling better (*yeay*) I ventured out into the world yesterday, for the first time in a week.
It was refreshing to breathe the cold New Jersey outside air into my lungs. Well it is amazing to breathe any air into my lungs with the now thankfully fading pneumonia.
(yes… even while being sick, I have smoked a few cigarettes, but I believe we have discussed this? I smoke. The end. Ringing any bells? Breathing New Jersey air is like smoking anyway.)
Man, am I glad! I decided to go shopping YESTERDAY!
Fuck! It’s cold!
This is the first time since ‘winter’ (and I use that term loosely) that it has been in the teen-degree range. And the first time I have turned on my heat. Because I am poor, I would not turn on my heat without the imminent threat of frostbite.
Being that I knew it was supposed go be this cold, I wanted to secure my fridge with all the wholesome goodness of organic yogurt, hummus, and fresh cut fruit (the Crohn’s approved foods) so I can spend the rest of the weekend indoors, under blankets, watching sappy movies, reading a book, writing this post, and relaxing, before going back to work Monday.
Of course, I didn’t drive, to the store myself because yeah, um, THAT TIRE, THIS TIRE, this damn TIRE is FLAT! YUP! FLAT! Oh yeah…AGAIN. But I’ll get back to that later. (See the ABOVE POST)
Now, here’s yet another lovely bonus to having Crohn’s, (aside from the gas, the pain, the diarrhea, the hospital, many invasive tests, not being able to absorb a single vitamin or mineral from food, the weight loss, the hundreds of embarrassing moments, and a zillion other disturbing factors.) oh and (I really really really miss burgers and a perfect porter-house steak.) …..On top of all of that! Inconvenience! in your life, you HAVE TO / are FORCED TO shop in over priced grocery stores. $ $ $ $
You can no longer just run to Shoprite, use wonderful coupons and pick up any ol’ thing you feel like eating, that is, if you plan on keeping at least some of it inside of you long enough to digest.
Only Wegmans and Wholefoods (a.k.a wholepaycheck) shelve the kind of gluten-free, organic, hippy-dippy food I used to “poo-poo†(NO PUN- I swear.) How? is someone like me on such a tight budget supposed to SHOP at Wegmans? Or Wholefoods?
Especially when they have a POWER OUTAGE while you are shopping?
Let me tell you how unpleasant it is to be inside a supermarket being led by employees with flashlights to finish filling your cart with things you cant afford.
Instead of spending 87 cents on a box of angel hair pasta, now I have to spend $65,000.00 on the same angel hair pasta that is Gluten, Wheat, Flour free. IN THE DARK
I have no idea what to do with fruit? How do you cut it? How do you know if it’s ripe? Good? Dry? Mealy? … I remember a Seinfeld episode when Jerry states, “I am not returning this cantaloupe. Fruit is a gamble. I know that going in.â€
I don’t even know what? I am gambling with. Even if the lights were working I would not have any idea how to buy fruit. So choosing it in the DARK, was a bonus. I can blame any bad fruit choices on he fact that I purchased these items IN THE DARK.
Here’s to learning how to eat healthy. And paying way too much money in order to do so!
I will say this, had it been a Shoprite, when all the lights went out, I would have walked out of the building, leaving everything in the cart, or, on the conveyer belt of the check-out. But, because it was WEGMANS, I stayed, I shopped, I over paid and came home.
Now…. For the god damned tire
(supposed to be fixed TODAY?…we will see…we will see… THIS TIRE was supposed to be “fixed†four-other-times…so I have heard, yeah, it’s “fixed†too many times to believe that statement to ever be true again…*sigh*)
You dont need a new tire. You are getting hosed. I’ll bet you a dollar your car has aluminum rims (the shiny wheel part the tire wraps around), which can go bad in extremely cold weather after years of use, causing your tire to no longer meet the rim properly and thus lose air. Next tire also buy a new, stainless steel rim (pricier than one tire, but cheaper than constantly getting new tires!) and I bet it will solve your problem. Ask your dad what he thinks.
Smooches.
OH I KNOW THE TIRE IS FINE ITS THE STEEL RIM (NOT ALUMINUM) THAT’S ALL DENTED WHICH KEEPS MAKING THE TIRE FLAT
BECAUSE I DROVE HE CAR ON THE FLAT TIRE….DENTING THE RIM, AND BADLY
IT TOOK 4 HOURS 4 PLACES AND MY FATHER TO BECOME A TEORRORIST TO GET THE FUCKIG THING FIXED TODAY
I AM WRITNG A WHOLE BIG ASS THING ON IT NOW
COMPLETE WITH PICTURES OF MY CRAZY / AND FUNNY ASS DADDY
HOLY HILLARIOUS DAY
HOLY HILLARIOUR POST TO BE UP IN FEW HOURS…..
Happy to hear you are feeling better!
🙂
THANK YOU! IM HAPPY TO BE FEELING BETTER
JUST SO YOU KNOW, I AM WRITING A POST RIGHT NOW ABOUT MY FATHER AND MY TIRE DRAMA OF THE DAY……. FUNNY SHIT……
PLEASE MAKE SURE YOU CHECK BACK ON THE BLOG LATER OR TOMORROW
ID LOVE TO HEAR WHAT YOU THINK OF THE NEW POST
(SHOULD BE UP IN A FEW HOURS)
THANK YOU SO MUCH!
PS….
HOW ARE THE 17 KIDS AND 45 JOBS YOU HAVE?
I TRULY ADMIRE / RESPECT THE HELL OUT OF YOU FOR WHAT YOU DO AND HOW HARD YOU WORK FOR YOUR FAMILY
IM GLAD / PROUD TO “KNOW” YOU…….
opppss I forgot to tell you something Meleah, this central runner person is Francisco 🙂
I have read your last blog over and over and over again, don’t ask me why but it’s very interesting and somewhat funny! I am happy to hear you are feeling better but not happy to know your pneumonia still lingers.
Stay safe and warm young lady or else!
FV 🙂
damned and I missed it?? I would have yelled “FIREEEEEEEEEE” just for kicks!!!
hahhahahahaah
I’m being silly tonight as I haven’t eaten yet
FV
OHHH!
well, that makes sence
central jersey runner / Fransisco SAME GUY
got it
Good afternoon my friend,
As I read your blog I couldn’t even imagine how you must have felt. First shopping under darkness, then the freaking tire is supposed to be fixed or so they say.
In regards of fruits, well Meleah, there is not a one single secret about it. to know how and when a cantaloupe is ripe is like reading the palm of your hand. There is no two ways about it nor is there a specific tapping or shaking of the fruit to know wether is riped or not.
You know if you want for someone to do stuff for you just ask, and I know you are going to say ” who am I going to ask”?
well ANYONE who cares for you should be able to do it 🙂
I am hoping you have had a good day, I just came home from work so Im off to watch some TV and do whatever else needs to be done.
FV
wondered since you are a CHEF? right? and a healthy person if you had any tips? secrets? clues? as to how to buy friut…?
Hey, M! Did it ever occur to you that your electric personality shorted out the Wegman’s? Something to think about? The shopping thing’s a kick especially with the image of a guy leading you around the store with a flashlight so you can overpay for your food. Great. Keep up the good work.
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Al The Fan
Like I said Meleah, certain fruits are tricky, melons, cantaloupes, watermelons, and most tropical seeded fruits are a pain. Tropical citrus fruits are more manageable than others.
In regards of cantaloupes some say look and feel the fruit. I say make sure its not that green nor that pale orangy colour. Too much of that orangy pale color may sometimes mean its way past its ripe stages.
But as a rule of thumb remind yourself that we are in the middle of winter, some fruits are in their peak stages others really suck in flavor.
What can you eat other than fruits…..give me the whole down list and I will take care of you 🙂
FV
oh! so thats a CLUE/HINT/IDEA..for fruit purchases!
I will email you a LIST of things I can eat, and maybe you can tell me how to DIVERSIFY cooking CHICKEN?
Im psyched to have a CHEF help me figure out how to EAT ….
I miss Wegmans. It’s been quite some time since Iv’e been there and i shit you not we lost the power in the store too for about 10-15 minutes.I am glad you ar making the effort to eat healthy (as if you have a choice +you do)It is an ortion I should really crack down on myself.Perhaps you could learn me. I meant to read this the other day. I promised myself I would get back to it .