I light of the Holiday Season, instead of focusing on writing about my my dry chapped hands, or the crappy weather, I thought I would share with ya’ll some of the things I found, saw, and read on the internet over the past week.
[Because nothing gets me into the spirit of the Holiday Season quite like laughter.]
I hope you enjoy these little treats as much as I did.
1] The ‘Woods Family’ Christmas Card:
2] The Annual Christmas Card Letter:
My very dear, real life friend [and kickawesome writer] Michael Christleman, from the blog: The Wonderful World Of Nothing Worthwhile has out done himself yet again, with his own version of the Annual Christmas Card Letter and it’s written from a wife’s point of view!
If you have ever received a Christmas Card Letter from a friend/family member where it seems as if they are only writing to simply to brag about how great their lives are – then I suggest you read his version of ‘The Annual Christmas Card Letter’ for yourself – by clicking HERE!*
3] A Letter Written To Mall Kiosk Workers:
I have recently discovered a blog written by Ms. Terri titled Writing In Crayon. I have enjoyed reading her posts because she has a wonderful sense of humor, and a terrific way with words. I would like to highlight one of her blog posts in particular.
*If you have ever been annoyed, irritated, or frustrated by those ever-so-pushy Kiosk Workers, they very people we try desperately to avoid while frantically shopping for Christmas Presents, then I am urging you to take the time and read this ‘Letter To A Mall Kiosk Worker’, by clicking HERE!* I promise, you will laugh out loud.
4] The Entirely Unorthodox Holiday Gift Giving Guide:
I am not ashamed to admit that I have the biggest Girl Crush on the very lovely and talented LiLu who writes the HILARIOUS blog Live It Love It. Seriously, she makes me laugh every day with her TMI Thursday Posts and The Shiz My Boyfriend Says.
*If you are looking for some interesting, funny, or even disgusting Holiday gifts, you need to click HERE!
5] The Grand Whiffer:
My friend Mooooog35, otherwise known as The Midget Man Of Steel [or simply ROD for short] who writes the sometimes sick and twisted and always comical blog Mental Poo – wrote a post awhile that has absolutely NOTHING to do with the holidays whatsoever. But, it was the funniest thing I think I have ever read – in my entire life.
*So, if you are into Old Ladies, Grandmothers and Farts, then you will laugh until your face falls off – by clicking HERE! And even if your not into those things, you should still click on that link. Seriously.
6] Bonus Material:
And now for something totally unrelated and way off topic!
I have talked about my girlfriend Amy The Bartender MANY times on this blog, because I have so much fun with her, and quite frankly, she’s my best friend. But, I don’t think I have ever mentioned just how BLIND Amy The Bartender really is.
* I have witnessed Amy The Bartender squint her eyes so tightly it causes her whole face to contort.
* I have watched Amy The Bartender confuse people she should have been able to recognize with ease. But, the first time I realized Amy’s eyesight was completely out of whack, was the day an African American Male came into KHCC and she thought he was My Father.
*And, I really knew Amy The Bartenders eyesight was long gone – back when I first created her Title.
Now, I completely understand why Amy The Bartender cannot wear contact lenses because of her intensive ‘Dry Eye’ situation. But nothing, and I mean absolutely NOTHING – prepared me for this.
One fine Sunday afternoon, Amy The Bartender and I decided to go to The Movies. After getting our seats and settling down, I looked over at Amy only to see this:
What. The. Hell?
Yeah, um…
Apparently, Amy The Bartender not only wears her Prescription Sunglasses while driving at NIGHT and IN THE DARK, but she ALSO wore them for the duration of the movie, because those are the only prescription glasses she owns.
Who ELSE Does That?
[I think I just might have to buy Amy The Bartender REGULAR Prescription Glasses for Christmas this year, because I just can’t be seen in a movies with that again!]
I can see my epitaph now:
“His one legacy is that he made people laugh…mostly in an article he wrote about farting on an old woman. He’s in Hell now.”
Awesome.
Thanks, Meleah! And, oh..Lilu is on top of me…or below me…either way, color me smiling.
We’re twisted like that. Not literally, but I’m working on it.
The Christmas letter, OMG! That was hilarious!
I think I have a girl crush on Amy the Bartender.
And you as well, my dear. Thanks so much for the shout out! 😉
Thank you for your lovely comment I do try to be grandma with rules and sometimes be one of the guys..or I mean girls yet they know my expectations and regarding your post I love it and will try to visit all the blogs you commented about..especially the wonderful world of nothing worthwhile which is how we all feel sometimes.
My next post is related to Lady GA GA I love her…
see ya soon…dorothy from grammology
Moooog35:
You’re Welcome.
🙂
Terri:
Michael did a GREAT JOB writing that one!
xoxoxo
LiLu:
My Pleasure!
You.Rock.
xoxoxo
Dorothy:
Oh, Im looking forward to your next blog post. You are such a cool grandmother!!
I promise you will NOT be disappointed by clicking on the links! I know you will REALLY enjoy Micheals blog, and I think YOU will get a kick out of the letter to the mall employee. But, being that you ARE a Grandmother, I feel it is my duty, and I MUST warn you about Mooog and LiLu! They are VERY FUNNY people with awesome blogs, but they can also be VERY graphic! Just saying!!
🙂
HA HA HAAAA! Funny photo … I work with two guys that refuse to wear glasses, or even admit they need them.
“Can you dial this number for me” ???
The Christmas letters are legendary in my family. One Aunt in particular has the brag list that always takes two sheets. They must live on some kind of Utopian planet.
Happy Holidays from the Hollydale’s
(( that’s my X-mas letter ))
heheeee 🙂
Thanks for the holiday links, Meleah. The Christmas letter is great! Amy looks like she’s getting ready to audition for the Blues Brothers. Is she taking Belushi’s place?
Amy will be real happy with her regular prescription glasses. It is very sweet of you to be so thoughtful. 🙂
Speedy;
Your Aunt sounds like FUN!
Ahahaha
And the Tiger photo cracks me up!
Marty:
You’re very welcome! And please, I could barley watch the whole movie because all I could see out of the corner of my eye was ‘Terminator Amy’ sitting next to me!
BK:
She actually called me TODAY to tell me that she finally found her REAL prescription sunglasses that are NOT sunglasses, and what a difference it was to drive with the RIGHT kind of glasses on her face!
Great Xmas letter. I have half a mind (the sober half) to steal it for our letter this year. Love the gift list. I think you gave me some great ideas for the nephews, but I don’t think their wives/girlfriends will appreciate it as much. Of course, moooooog35 is just a literary classic.
Agg79:
Im sure Michael would give you permission to ‘borrow’ it!
The gift list was classic, and happily I already OWN a leg lamp! But NO – not too wives/girlfriends would like those gifts!!
And yes, mooog is a literary classic! HA!
By the way, YOU ROCK for checking out everyone’s links!
[And for being so awesomely YOU.]
Tat Makes Amy totally cool though. Seriously, she is at total ease with having them on. Not a hint of self consciousness.
Tiger is in BIG trouble. Why do these guys get married if they want to sleep around? I know if I was famous I wouldn’t get married. I have a big ass black book with all the names of the models and stuff. You’d see pictures of me in TMZ wearing beautiful suits and hot women on each arm at all the hot spots in NYC.
Meleah. You rule. 😉 (And I’m glad you like the leg lamp I gave you *wink* )
ALSO, and apropos of nothing, do we win a prize for being friends for TWENTY THREE FUCKING YEARS as of 2010 or What???
<- may be feeling old all of a sudden
Ricardo:
Yep. Thats my ATB!!
See, now at least you are smart enough to know you would have to have your whore phase BEFORE you ever get married to someone! And yeah, Tiger IS in big trouble, one of his sponsors DROPPED him today. what…an IDIOT!
Leslie:
I *LOVE* my leg lamp and NOT just because its from my Favorite Movie, but ALSO because its from YOU – my favorite friend of 23 fucking years!!
xoxoxo
Dood, we need to get our celebration ON in 2010.
Fur Reelz.
Monkey you are all set – back to normal bloggy activities
Oh Hell Yes!!! I love you SOFA KING MUCH!
wow. i love the new blog, been crazy with the baby dont ever get on your blog much , but i'm going to change that for the new year! I love the new look and feel, and of course love your writing STILL! AMy the bartender doesnt look that bad in the movie theater, come on shes just visually impaired!! 🙂 ALso the things that were funny to you were funny to me too… love the blog, love the post… happy holidays Meleah!!!
Thanks girl. And I will never STOP writing!
Amy is an absolute character. You have to get her some day prescription glasses. How can she see scenes shot at night with those sunglasses on? Too funny.
It's going to be a long time before Tiger Woods lives down his recent behaviour. That photo is hilarious!
OH MY LORD! IF I went to the movies and saw Amy the Bartender wearing those — I would totally lose it. Glad I'm not in the East Coast!!!!
I have NO IDEA how Amy sees IN THE DARK with SUNGLASSES!!!! She cracks me up!!
I couldn't even PAY attention to the movie! Because all I could see out of the corner of my eye was Amy looking like the TERMINATOR in her crazy sunglasses! She kills me.
honestly i had no idea until a few days ago that his wife did actually knock his teeth out…. omg
this cracks me up
honestly i had no idea until a few days ago that his wife did actually knock his teeth out…. omg
this cracks me up
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