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Wine

The following is an email from my mother.

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria.

In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 litre of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. coli) -bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop.

However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer (or tequila, rum, whiskey or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting.

Remember: Water = Poop, Wine = Health

Therefore, it’s better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I’m doing it as a public service.

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  • Lee

    Another bad thing about water is that fish have sex in it! But, in my case, I’m full of sh*t when I drink to a larger extent than when I don’t. I’ll just boil the water for my coffee. πŸ™‚

  • Whew! I’m feeling much better about those margarita’s I drank last night. Would the ice count as just a sprinkling of poop?

  • FV

    HAHAHAHAHA

    You are telling me something I already knew πŸ™‚ even though I still drink my 1 gallon of water per day and I work next to an e-coli lab.

    Oh how funny!
    πŸ˜€

    xo

    FV

  • no wonder i never drink water… of course i almost never get a chance to drink wine or beer or any of that fun stuff either… but i boil my coffee water…….

  • LOL!! good to know.

  • LOL!!! but i’m told it’s a little too late for me.

  • Cheers! I’ll be sipping my Yellow Tail Shiraz this evening and thinking about the wisdom of mothers.

  • To think I hate drinking water and love drinking wine! This is excellent info!

  • I wonder how many people get liver failure from drinking too much water. πŸ˜›

  • Think about it…fish F#%K in water….

  • You’re too funny, Mereb. I will say that I only drink bottled water. They always say that Chicago has some of the best drinking water in the country, but if I’m living in a 100 year old bldg, and that water has to travel through – at the very least – VERY old pipes, how healthy can that be?

  • Pretty funny. Your mom’s a scream. And of course now we hear about plastic bottled water causing cancer..pass me the rum.

  • LOL – as I sit here drinking a bottle of water! Water is all I drink really, excpet for Bailey’s once in a while. So I guess when people tell me I’m full of shit they’re right!

  • Ah, luckily I have a shit-filter for all of my water. Now if only Brita would make mouthgards…

  • Thank you… i feel sooo much better now that it’s been confirmed πŸ˜‰

  • Thank you for giving me an intelligent response for why I never drink water. And they say all that diet coke is going to rot my stomach. Pffft!

  • Now when people criticise me for my wine to water ratio of 3:1, I can tell them it’s good for my health. The wine is killing the bacteria in the water. YAY!

  • Haha, I did not know this. This is a great excuse for my ‘habit’, lol.

  • That’s very amusing! your mom has a great sense of humor! Actually though, e-coli isn’t poop, it is a bacteria and most strains are harmless and most of us consume all sorts of bacteria in a normal day. I know, I know, it’s a minor thing but I hate misinformation. I have a friend who still believes you can catch a cold by going outside in the snow with wet hair. To this day she doesn’t believe that a “cold” is a germ and wet hair won’t make a difference.

  • I just awarded you…drop by to pick it up! πŸ™‚

  • Oh great Meleah, now I can drink wine like crazy and tell people it’s for the good of my health … LOL!

    Happy weekend.

  • ugh. that is really gross Meleah but if it justifies having some more wine then why the hell not? these are words of wisdom.

  • pass the Jack Daniels…

  • I guess I’ll just start drinking more wine then water!

  • Lis

    Your mum sends the BEST emails!

  • olly

    That is so true .
    At least we know what’s in the booze. LOL
    Feel better.
    xoxox

  • Some water also contains traces of cyanide. Mmmm……. Tasty.

  • Then there was the woman driving home from a meeting and spotted an Indian woman walking at the side of the road. Pickup her up and gave her a ride. After a long silence and much observation on the part of the Indian woman, she asked what was in the brown bag on the front seat. The woman it was a bottle of wine she got for her husband. The Indian woman replied: Good trade!

  • Meleah

    And The Drinks Are ON ME people!

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