“The doctor will see you now,” a stout, redheaded, nurse called out from behind the glass partition.
I put down the gossip magazine and kept replaying the events of my Near Death Experience over and over in my mind. Still hoping it was all a bad dream, I slowly made my way back to the exam room.
The smell of rubbing alcohol lingered in the air after the nurse took my vitals. I can’t tell you what she looked like because I was too distracted by the sound of the sterilized, white, paper crunching underneath me. Gazing around, I noticed my purple chart covered in bright orange sticky notes:
Allergic to Aspirin.
See Attached Lists.
I went to grab my file for a closer look inside, when the door flung wide open. “And how are you today, Meleah?” Kindly asked my allergist.
Startled, I quickly replied, “Um…I’ve been better.” A wave of panic began to set it.
I hate seeing the doctor. My visits usually end with bad news. Especially with all of my Annoying Medical Conditions.
“Looks like you had quite a scare the other day. I received a copy of your discharge papers…” his soothing voice trailed off while he read the report.
I nervously twirled my brown hair around my sweaty fingers, anxiously waiting for him to finish. What did the report say? What’s going to happen now? Will I be sent for more tests? A million questions raced through my mind.
My doctor abruptly closed the file and put it down on the shiny, black, desk. He took off his thin, silver rimmed glasses, smoothed his salt and pepper hair, and looked me square in the eyes. “Do you understand it’s a miracle that you’re still alive?”
In that instant, my shock must have worn off. This was no dream. And I broke down.
Sobbing, all I could manage to say was, “Yes.”
I wiped my face with the bottom of my yellow t-shirt, and tried pulling myself together.
“We are going to take good care of you.” He handed me a blue box of Kleenex.
He put his glasses back on, and picked up my file again. “The last time we ran a full-blood-test panel for your food allergies was back in 2008. I am going to order new ones. By the look of things here, you already have an extensive list of ‘Do Not Eat’ foods. We need to find out exactly what else you are allergic to.”
“M’kay.” I nodded, with tears streaming down my red-hot cheeks.
“Because you have Crohn’s Disease, it makes your hypersensitivity to food all the more severe.”
“Why…?” I asked.
He smiled, “Let’s pretend that everyone’s body is like an exclusive Night Club. And, at the door there are two bouncers keeping out the riff-raff.”
I stopped crying and started paying attention. “Okay, I like that analogy.”
He continued, “However, in your case, since the intestines are so damaged, the door to your Night Club is much wider. In fact, it’s probably triple in size. And you still only have two bouncers. They run back and forth trying to keep out the riff-raff, but sometimes, things just slip through. The more stuff that slips through, leads to higher histamine levels in your body causing an Anaphylaxis reaction.”
He put my file back down, and took off his glasses again. I couldn’t decide if his eyes were baby blue, or sky blue, and I couldn’t believe I’d never noticed the color of his eyes before.
His dark brown pants crinkled with each move, before sitting down and crossing his legs. “Let me ask you a few questions…Have you been under a lot of stress recently?”
“Actually, yes.” I sighed. “I was in a car accident about two months ago. And things in my household have been extremely tense, lately.” I really didn’t want to delve into specifics and I hoped he wouldn’t probe any deeper.
Titling his head to the left he explained, “When you only have two bouncers working an already oversized door, it’s very important they don’t get too tired. When you are stressed, anxious, or worried, the bouncers run out of steam – and then they can’t do their job properly.”
“Oh.” I sighed.
“I am also going to run some tests to see if you have ‘Leaky Gut Syndrome’.”
My voice cracked. “What the heck is that?”
“Basically, it’s inflammation and irritation to the lining of your digestive tract. Over time, the intestinal lining begins to wear and break down. That’s from Crohn’s. Large gaps form between your intestinal cells, which then allow toxins, pathogens, and undigested food particles to enter your bloodstream. Soon after, your liver becomes overloaded with toxins. Your immune system becomes impaired after being continuously assaulted by unwanted substances. Your hormonal system becomes fatigued after trying to keep up with both the stress of the intestinal permeability along with the stress of everyday life. Your body is just not designed to handle this chronic state as there is no time to properly rest and repair.”
“Right….” My head was spinning. “Is there anything I can do to help alleviate some of these symptoms? Or is there anything I can do to prevent another allergic reaction?”
“Maybe. In addition to ordering Epi-Pens, I am going to prescribe a medication called GastroCrom. You will need to take 2 ampules 20 minutes before eating any meals. It’s a liquid that should work to coat the insides of your intestines. It’s kind of like adding more bouncers to your door. It’s not a cure. And you still need to avoid the foods you’re allergic to. But this might help prevent future outbreaks. At best, it might lessen the intensity of such reactions.”
“Alrighty.” I almost felt a restored sense of control.
He clicked his pen and started writing, “Here’s the prescription you will need to take to have your blood-work done. We have to find out what you are allergic to on this list”
All I could see were check marks next to everything.
“Seriously?” I shouted.
“Yes. Seriously.” He smiled at me. “You could be allergic to any and every thing on this list.”
And that’s precisely when my jaw hit the floor.
“The hell….”
I stared at the paper.
“In the meantime,” He cleared his throat, “I highly suggest you steer clear of these foods. I am placing you on a restrictive diet, until the blood test results come back.”
“Well….what can I eat?”
“Funny thing is, most people are allergic to dairy, and/or shellfish. And those are the only things you’re not allergic to.”
“Oh yeah, that’s hilarious, Doc.” I said sarcastically.
“I know. This is going to be difficult.”
Still baffled, I asked, “So…I can eat cheese?”
“Yes. And, you can have PLAIN meats. No spices. No sides. No bread. No wheat or gluten-products. No fruits or vegetables….”
For some reason, at that very moment a Seinfeld episode popped into my head, and I interrupted him, “No, soup for you!”
Thankfully, my allergist has a good sense of humor and laughed along with me.
Long story short, I have not eaten anything other than meat and cheese for the past 12 days. And I cannot eat anything other than meat and cheese until the test results come back.
And so, we wait….
* Have any of you ever been placed on a restricted diet? And if so, why? And, for how long? And, how did it work out for you?
PS: I’m counting on all of you to help distract me. Okay?
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