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Trying To Find My ‘Swing’

First, I would like to mention one of the most ‘Kick Ass People’ I have EVER *met*. A big fat ‘Thank You’ goes out to my friend Gina, for giving me This Award. Seriously, her and I have so much in common, I think I may have found my ‘Twin’!

Now, as some of you may already know, I just started playing Golf last summer.

Well, that’s not entirely true.

Let me give you some back-story.

When I was a little girl my mother used to send me, and my younger brother Abercrombie, to Daytona Beach in Florida to spend the summers with my grandparents Manga and Poppa Sye. My grandmother Manga spoiled us with her delicious ‘Liverwurst Sandwiches’ and her famous homemade ‘Polpetta Soup’. And my grandfather Poppa Sye was in charge of teaching us how to play golf, and taking us out to the ‘Country Club’.

My brother and I absolutely loved spending the summers with them. But that’s another blog post for another time. Now, I haven’t really played the game of golf since I was around 11 years old. And that’s because I quit, mostly due to the fact that my younger brother always won. And I really hated losing to him.

So, fast-forward to last summer.

Some of ‘The Girls’ from my local Country Club [KHCC] started playing golf on a regular basis. And I would go out with them, but only to play the role of Paparazzi. I never dared to pick up a club. That is until one day, when ‘Amy The Bartender’ made me take a swing. Much to everyone’s surprise, I was NOT terrible. I suppose some of what I had learned as a child stuck with me. And that’s when it became clear my ‘Inner Athlete’ was still very much alive. I spent the rest of that summer enjoying the game and playing nearly every weekend.

That being said, I really couldn’t wait for the ‘Golfing Season’ to start this year. I was even more excited because for the first time since we were kids, my brother would be joining us. Little did I know the ‘Psychological Effect’ having my brother ‘On The Course’ would have over me.

The first time we went out to ‘Play Golf’, my girlfriends Suzy Mazz, and ‘Amy The Bartender’ totally reaped the benefits of having my brother Abercrombie present because he was more than helpful. In fact, he instructed them so well, it was just like they were receiving ‘Private Lessons’.

But when the time came for my brother to help me?

That’s when the difficulties began.

I was completely awkward. I felt almost as if I had never swung a golf club in my entire life.

Which is clearly demonstrated in the photographs below:

No matter what my brother told me, I kept ‘Popping Up’ on my back swing, rather than ‘Staying Down’.

I heard his words loud and clear, and I understood exactly what he was saying, but it felt completely unnatural for my body to stay in the ‘Correct Position’.

Fortunately, no one was hurt.

Amy and Suzy continued to receive advice from my brother. And they both did a great job. They were easily able to implement all of the ‘Knowledge’ my brother shared with them and rather quickly. I was highly impressed when they both made Par on the Third Hole.

Sadly. Yours truly did not do so well.

Seriously people. All day long, my game went more like this:
A ‘Swing’ and a ‘Miss.’ [insert cursing.] Another ‘Swing’ and another ‘Miss.’ [insert MORE cursing.] Another ‘Swing and a near ‘Miss.’ [insert almost crying and MORE cursing.]

‘Rinse And Repeat’.

According to my brother, I was ‘Choking Down’ way too much on the club because my ‘Grip’ was wrong.

And my brother was absolutely right.


It was nothing short of a Miracle when I actually made Contact with the ball.

And even though it really took us FOUR HOURS to play a mere SIX HOLES we enjoyed each other’s company and we certainly laughed a lot.

The second time we went out to ‘Play Golf’, my brother was more than happy to join us again. Honestly, he must have the patience of a ‘Saint’ to be able to withstand teaching three ‘Newbies’ that move very, very, very, very, very, very slowly around the course. And who like to take many, many, many, many, many, many, many  ‘Do-Over’ swings and shots.

Once again, Amy and Suzy learned a lot from my brother and they both did very well.

And once again, I was out of sorts.

My grip was still wrong, my stance was way off, and my swing was absolutely disastrous.

I looked more like I was fleeing from the ‘Scene Of A Crime’ than ‘Playing Golf’.


As much as I would like to blame my ridiculous stance, crazy bent knees, and my horrendous swing on the fact that I am wearing one too many layers of clothing since it was probably only 30 degrees outside. I simply can’t.

I also tried to disguise my ‘Total Lack Of Motor Skills’ by at least sporting a Matching Set of Burberry earmuffs and scarf in hopes that the other people would become too distracted by the pretty pattern and forget all about the fact that I kept MISSING THE BALL!

Now, I was becoming increasingly frustrated.

I really couldn’t figure out WHY this was happening to me every single time my brother came any where near me.

At one point, I almost gave up completely. I thought it might be better for everyone if I just stayed in the cart taking photos.

But, I am not a quitter.

Not by any stretch of the imagination.

When I am determined to accomplish something, come HELL or HIGH WATER, I will reach my goal!

Then, suddenly it dawned on me. I used to have this exact problem when I was a little kid. It’s the very reason I quit the sport all together. For whatever reason, as soon as I realize my brother is watching me? I cannot hit the ball. I just can’t.

So, I told Abercrombie that he was NOT ALLOWED to come near me, or talk to me, or even LOOK at me while I tried to hit the next ball.

And he obliged.

Moments later, as if my magic, I got my swing back.

At least a little.

I felt completely different without the stare from my brother’s eyes on me. Thankfully, everything my brother had been trying to teach me sunk into my brain. I remembered to rotate my body rather than ‘Pop Up’ and I kept my weight on my left foot. I remembered NOT to ‘break my wrists’ during my back swing. And I tried my very best to ‘Stay Down’.

Eventually I made a few good shots.

I even had one ‘Excellent Drive’ on the Fifth Hole.

And sometimes, you just need that ‘One Good Hit’ to make all the difference in your game.

Because after that? I was able to find my center. And, I did MUCH better.

I am absolutely looking forward to improving my skills and playing as often as possible. And of course, my brother is more than welcome to join us ANYTIME he wants. Just as long as he does not look at me while I am taking a swing! And for obvious ‘Safety Reasons’ he probably shouldn’t stand too close to me either.

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  • RonnieC

    BRAVA!….woo! woo! woo!

    OMG, I was so excited for you when I got to that last photo, I APPLAUDED!!!!!

    You GO, girl!

    First, these photos and captions were freakin' BRILLIANT! I laughed my ass off at the mugger shots. You are so clever, my friend!

    I know I keep saying this, but you and I are SOOOOOOO much a like. I CANNOT be watched while I'm learning something. I have to process what I'm learning on my own and then gradually allow myself execute it….SLOWLY. For me, learning something is taking what I'm taught, and then doing it on my own.

    And us Libras are not quitters, are we?


    GREAT post, Meleah!

  • Libras never quit!!! I'm happy to liked this post! 🙂

  • Yeah. I think it's just a psychological issue because I LOVE playing
    golf with my brother and I LOVE spending time with him – but he just
    can't look at me when I take a swing!

  • If it's the F bomb it's the same!

  • I love golf!

  • I'm glad you like that photo! And you know I love you!

  • Yeah you will either love it or hate it right away!

  • Thanks for the tip speedy!!! Xoxoxoox

  • It was way too cold to play but since I am DTD I did it anyway!

    That is REALLY expensive! I would never pay 400$ to play 18 holes!

    I might spend that on a set of nice clubs but not one round of golf!

  • 🙂

  • I really do love my quality time with my brother! We've always been
    really close since we were kids! I am truly blessed.

  • You nailed it perfectly!

  • cmk

    I SHOULD like golf because most hockey players play–but, alas, I really can't stand the game. I'm happy that you have something you love doing, however. XOXOXOXOXO

  • Meleah, your a sweet heart and I'll bet you be great as you have your mind set to do it. Best of luck and one of my favorite sandwiches to this day is liverwust…
    Dorothy from grammology

  • I hadn't even read 1/3 of your post when I was (literally) yelling at the computer “IT'S BECAUSE OF YOUR BROTHER!!!” hahahaha…I grew up with 2 brothers and it never failed, whenever they were around I started doing things “like a girl”! You're brother seems MUCH more patient than mine ever were, though.

    So, when do you start with the LPGA? 🙂

  • Well well…. Looks like I’ll have to bring my clubs when we meet for lunch my dear. Perhaps you can help my long game!
    .-= Oscar´s last blog ..Business as Unusual =-.

  • It was way too cold to play but since I am DTD I did it anyway!

    That is REALLY expensive! I would never pay 400$ to play 18 holes! I might spend that on a set of nice clubs but not one round of golf!

  • Ive never been able to play tennis, probably because I'm a smoker!

  • 🙂

  • My Gramma made The Best Sammiches!

  • YAY! I am not ALONE! Hopefully I will be able to get over that soon! And, yes he really IS patient!
    I dont plan on playing in the LPGA, but I do have a few outings I will be attending!

  • michellegartner

    Okay but I would rather spend $400 on cheese. HA HA! – It is a beautiful course though and they make a mean cheesebuger in the clubhouse. Or maybe the call it a chezbahga – point your nose up when you say it.

  • michellegartner

    Oh but Whistling Straits is Tres Fancy- wee wee- actually I don't think the Kohlers are french- although they do make fancy piss pots.

  • Mmm! Cheese!

  • 400 dollars on Wisconsin cheese would be nice, maybe next time I invade your fine state 🙂

  • Stop by when you get a chance….theres a little bling on my page for you! 🙂

  • You look so cute in that golf cart. I don't care about golf but that red & beige (I think it is beige) outfit is mighty fine on u.

  • nickphillips

    At least you can golf. I couldn't golf even if my life depended upon it!

  • Aw! YAY!

  • Thanks Roshan! I was FREEEZING!

  • Its a TOUGH sport!

  • territerri

    I want to go golfing! Although, I'd prefer if it were sunny and warm and ear muffs weren't required.

  • hole in one…?

  • Me too Terri!
    Im hoping playing under these conditions will be Good Karma for the rest of
    the year!

  • I've played a decent amount of golf but it's not really my thing. I like something faster paced, though maybe if I had a six pack of beer and a few fun friends I bet it would be pretty entertaining. I may have to give it a whirl again.

    I love the pictures!

  • Bee

    I've never gone golfing but if I can be a passenger in a golf cart with a beer cooler, I'd be willing to try it!

  • barbaraLayla

    It looks like you had fun! Maybe you won't be the next golf star, but you look good out there

  • Golf really Can be frustrating. But, it can also be a LOT of fun!

  • You have the right idea!

  • Thanks Barbara!

  • I have always wanted to learn how to play golf. We have a course right by the house and it always looks like such fun. One day.

    I love the picture where your brother is hiding in the cart to away from your swing. And all that *reaping the benefits* and *free lessons* just sounds dirty.

  • My poor brother! And that does sound 'dirty' as does this” I was ‘Choking Down’ way too much on the club because my ‘Grip’ was wrong.

  • ladyV

    i like playing golf on the wii, and i've been looking at your photos. you're doing okay by me if you can even hit the ball, once.

  • Ahahahhahaha!
    I'm getting a little better each time!

  • LOVE THIS POST! Love that you're out there learning something new. I need to too and have always wanted to try golf. Well…try it AGAIN I should say. 1st time was ridiculous.

  • Oh you should DEFINITELY try it again!

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