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Shattered. Echo. Silence.

This is a poem I wrote when I was all of 15 years old.
Shattered. Echo. Silence.

Shattered, Echo, Silence
In my head
My eyes are alive
My body is dead

The laughter decays
The phantom is still
Go on
Take another hit
Have another pill

We are motionless floating
Mulitcoloured souls
Dancing naked in the forest
With the fairies and the trolls

We will see no more pain
With our acid glazed glance
Everything is beautiful, blissful in our trance

My head screams the mad
The bazaar
A schizoid crash
My body is diseased
Sore
Cut
And raw
The infinite rash

The molester of my thoughts
Took the beauty and gave me pain
My head is running, I can feel it, think the insane

My eyes are watery
My mind is empty
I am on my way back home
With these twisted black circles of mine
I can see that I am alone

I see nothing
I feel nothing
I remember nothing going on in my head
I am quietly drifting off to sleep
Into the nothingness of my bed.

[currently, totally freaking out for posting this]

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  • I am so glad you kept your journals and art from those days. Scary to look back, but so good to see the view from where you are.

  • Meleah

    me too…..

  • Oh, teenage angst is so dark and deep and dangerous.

    I’m so glad I’ve nursed my boys through this most vile of periods.

    Your poem is heart wrenching and so despairing, Meleah.
    But what a dark pleasure to be able to look back from a distance and feel so glad to have left it behind..

    xx

  • Meleah

    MINX! Oh, how I love YOU! (nice job with the BOYS) I would NEVER ..EVER.. [eva -eva] want to be a teenager AGAIN! xx

  • You are inspiring, Meleah the Brave.

    Where were you when I was 15?

    Thank you for sharing your poem.

  • Meleah, I think your poem actually gives me some insight into my teenage daughters head. thanks for sharing it.

  • What a well written look into your past. Thank you for sharing.

    I have some posted on my site as well. When I get them labeled I’ll pass that along to you.

  • Meleah

    Lily: I hitchhiked all over the country from ages 15-17 visiting the friends I made at the private boarding high school I had gone to. (and running away from my mother, and myself) I was in CA when I wrote that.

    Dawn: Teenage years are the worst. I can only hope that I will remember to use what I learned to help my son get through his teens.

    Dazd: Thank you…and looking forward to seeing yours!

  • Meleah, Kudos to you for your courage in sharing something so personal with us. We have all been somewhere similar at some point in our “younger years”. …which was – I feel – a necessary part of honing in us the beautiful souls that now shine through.

  • FV

    huh?

  • meleah, i thought this was wonderful,, and i would love to share more if you have them,,, i only have the ones i remember in my head from those days,,, and they are few and sketchy… there is nothing like the morbid slap of life to really inspire the best writing… sometimes i wonder what the hell id have to talk about if i was really happy…….

  • olly

    I can totally relate and that is excellent writing at 15 my dear you were through or running from more shit than most would not even imagine experiencing in a LIFETIME !!!!
    That was awesome. I frikken love it. I am glad you put that out there . Keep up the good shit.
    Love Always
    OLLY

  • Meleah

    HOLLY: Oh hell yes, that TIME is WHY I am who I am TODAY

    FV: nevermind

    Paisley: I saved EVERYTHING, I have all my old poems, journals, half written book attempts, there will be plenty MORE where this came from. (and I have no idea what I would write or talk about if it wasn’t drama, dark, or complaning!… well except of course TV)

    Olly: Thank you sooo much. I love you too.

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