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Gone Drinking

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Happy St. Patrick’s Day! πŸ™‚

Just a few things to keep in mind on this holiday:

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Specificity
2. Anti-constitutionalistically
3. Passive-aggressive disorder
4. Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. No thanks, I’m married.
2. Nope, no more booze for me!
3. Sorry, but you’re not really my type.
4. Taco
Bell ? No thanks, I’m not hungry.
5. Good evening, officer. Isn’t it lovely out tonight?
6. Oh, I couldn’t! No one wants to hear me sing karaoke.
7. I’m not interested in fighting you.
8. Thank you, but I won’t make any attempt to dance, I have no coordination. I’d hate to look like a fool!
9. Where is the nearest bathroom? I refuse to pee in this parking lot or on the side of the road.
10. I must be going home now, as I have to work in the morning.

** Oh! And in other exciting news, I am in a MOVIE! Check THIS out!! **

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  • LOL… another reason why I can’t drink heavily anymore πŸ™ Not that being drunk and stumbling around was all that fun to begin with. There’s only so many times you can wake up in the morning and not crumble under the weight of crushing embarrassment from shit you did the night before.

    Yes and thank you…. I needed this! πŸ˜€

  • I always knew you’d make it in showbiz. Great moves. I’m not even going to try and say any of those things you shouldn’t say when you’re drunk when I’m sober. Especially transubstantiate. Have a wonderful St. Patrick’s Day!

  • THAT was HYSTERICAL!! You dance the jig so well!!! Love the difficult things to say too! Happy St. Patrick’s day!!!

  • Meleah

    Jillian:
    mmmmmmmm beer. Too bad I am ALLERGIC too it. Glad to make you smile as always. (promise to have something new for melevision SOON)

    Chef Mom:
    Who knew I could dance a JIG so well! xxoo

    Selma:
    yeah…you just say really funny things with an ear infection!!

  • I think you hit all of those on the nose.

  • Great stuff. I struggle with the English language when sober. Just ask all those people who corrected me on Liz Lemon not being a verb.

    Damn girl, you can dance!!

  • I loved the movie – except the last part where it looks like your head is going to fall off. And, yes, I have tried to say all of those things drunk – I wish I had a tape recording…

  • Meleah

    Urban:
    πŸ™‚ I try.

    Michael C:
    Liz Lemon IS a verb. I will argue that point to death.

    Beth:
    I know I am almost HEADLESS, but I sure can rock one hell of a “Jig!”

  • Good thing I never get drunk! Well, ‘cept maybe a couple of times when I was HANGING AROUND YOU! πŸ™‚ Oh, and that time in Aruba. And maybe a little right now……….GAWD!……nevermind!!!!!/i> πŸ˜‰
    I LOVE our movie! I especially like the way you tip your head so it practically falls OFF……nice touch! Happy St. Paddy’s O’Bosom Buddy!
    xoxoxo

  • Ooops! Don’t try using html codes when drinking either! (hic!)

  • If I had any clean clothes I’d wear something green!!!

  • What usually comes out of my mouth

    I love you man. No, no seriously, I love you. And you! I love everybody. K, um, k, i’m like, gonna um, have everybody over for a bbq and a bonfire, on me cuz I love you man.

    Some people are a violent drunk, I’m a violent sober.

    Maybe I should drink more often?

  • Meleah

    Olga:
    I *heart* our movie. Now I feel all famous. πŸ™‚ You can ‘code’ drunk on my blog anytime.

    Mike (Spaziod Space):
    At least you arent one of those ANGRY types. Those kinda drunks frighten me. Ive dated those types. Not. Pretty.

    And after reading your comment, I think you SHOULD drink more.

    xxoo

    Caffinated Musing Mike:
    I cant wear green. Its just not one of my colors.

  • Shit, I can’t say “Specificity” when I’m sober.

  • Hahahahaahaha! This is absolutely the epitemy of truthfulness.

  • That’s pretty funny stuff πŸ™‚
    Of course, I can fully say all that stuff when I’m drunk. :-/

  • all that stuff falls under category one for me….:))))

  • I’m with Mike- I love the world after a few. My friends got quite annoyed with me because one of the EASIEST things for me to say while drinking was, “I just want to say goodbye to ONE more person…” fifteen times before leaving a club!

    Happy St. Patty’s Day!

  • Don’t pee in the parking lot! :O

    Glad you liked the movie! πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ Ahahahahaha

  • Bob

    Lol!!

  • Meleah

    Jeff:
    Me either!

    Diva:
    *wink wink* dont we know it all too well? xxoo

    Tesco:
    Of course YOU can

    Robert:
    I died. That video was sooo funny.

    Exposed:
    Oh I can NEVER leave once I get a few drinks in me!

    Drowsey:
    Thanks for helping to make me *famous* xxoo

    Bob:
    Welcome to my world!

  • Hysterical. Made me spray my Old Bushmill’s all over the screen!

    -smith

  • Meleah

    Murder:
    he he he he he he he he – I try.

  • I am impreshed wish yore cohoredinashun andjur shteppings. Or whuttevuh. You obviatedly play well witsh ushers. I hup you win the oschcur for besht actresh.

    And, I actually said all those words out loud. Just to be sure I was sober.

  • Meleah

    Lisa:
    Oh My God. That is toooo funny. I love how you spelled everything. You and KellyPea come up with The Best ways to spell things like:

    β€˜Yanno’ β€˜Foh-Toz’ β€˜Four-tee-Fy-uhv’ (so many more that I cant think of off the top of my head)

    And all of the above.

    Im dying.

    Loving It.

  • For some reason, I couldn’t leave comments on your blog yesterday. I’m glad I could get on here today to tell you how hard I laughed at that “movie”! And, #4 on the drunk list…hilarious!!

  • Meleah

    MoMo:
    I have NO IDEA, my blog works some days and other days Not So Much.

    I am glad that movie made you laugh. I was hysterical. But….if you thought THAT was funny….just wait till the next movie. That will be posted over here on Wednesday.

    Oh and #4=Classic Drunk Move. Classic. xxooo

  • Oh my god what a great list. That last part is so so true.

    Loved it. It sort of helped me to piece together what actually happened on Monday night. It’s still all sort of choppy.

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