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day five

Lets spend a minute focusing on some of the good / positive things (as even I am tired of listening to myself bitch and moan about how much THIS SUCKS… even though it still really does suck, and if I make it through today, after the morning I’ve had so far, it will truly be a miracle)

First, something funny…

Today, my patch wouldn’t stay STUCK.ON.MY.SKIN. It kept coming off, slipping off, sliding, moving. (is it a possessed patch? or maybe my body is rejecting it on purpose in an attempt to make me smoke? ) At one point it was stuck to the inside of my sweatshirt sleeve, not.my.body.at.all (hmmm, maybe that’s why I think it doesn’t work… it has to be stuck on my flesh, not my clothes to release the nicotine.) Nice that my hoody benefited more than I did.

So, after peeling the patch off the inside of my sweatshirt leaving all the good chemicals on cotton and not in my bloodstream, when I went to re-apply what ever was left of the now even more useless patch, it didn’t stick to my skin at all anymore.

So… I had to put THIS sticker OVER the PATCH to keep it in place on my SKIN

(I blurred out my work address, but, yes… that IS an actual mailing label for large sized envelopes, the patch is UNDER the mailing label to stay stuck to me)

and people can still read a clear warning, to STAY.THE.FUCK.AWAY.FROM.ME

Now for the good news:

1. This WEBSITE is AMAZING. The people are great! It is very informative and extremely supportive! Yeay! I spent my entire night, last night, on the forums, reading posts, getting emails and internet virtual meeting new people. From other fellow newbies to seasoned champions of quitting smoking, all together in a free exhange. Not to mention I really like some of the catch phrases / words and the general lingo used like “Nico-deamon” and Q-mmunity. It was something much needed and much appreciated. I will be spending a lot of time over on that site!

2. I am going to research this product CHANTIX because as I have learned, (or heard really) this just may be that magical pill I was wondering about!

3. I have scheduled an appointment with my DOCTOR so I can get the aforementioned prescription!

Now I’m off to work… will post later!

UPDATED… via comments section of this POST, my brother and his wife have also QUIT, they are using THIS PRODUCT:

So, I went ahead and said to myself, “Well, if it’s working for THEM, maybe? it will work for me… can’t hurt, Let’s give it a shot.”


Maybe? The lozenge would have worked / helped ? … BUT, having attempted a single lozenge on my lunch break…I can NOT stand the TASTE. It’s sidewalk chalk that you draw on driveways with, coupled with a mild stinging mint.gone.bad flavor. Or it can also be compared to the flavor of a Maloxx Max chewable and sour millk combination. Seriously, It’s THAT BAD. (I’d rather stick to chewing scotch tape wads.)

I did get a hold of my favorite.DOCTOR.ever… I don’t even have to go to his office. He is phoning IN the script so that I may pick that shit up on my my home!


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  • Anonymous

    So you finally quit the big one!!! SMOKING….


    There is a good web site that I found it is called nj.quitnet.com where if
    you registar they send you an email every fri with the $ you saved, the
    number of cigs not smoked and the hours you added back on your life.

    Good Luck, I just finished 6 months without a cig….


  • meleah rebeccah



    Thank you!

    I joined that site yesterday, the forums and the people are GREAT, THEY HAVE BEEN VERY INFORMATIVE AND SUPPORTIVE

    But I have PMS and I am PISSED the fuck off at work today (SO CRAZY NEW PRODUCER and my FATHER making me CRAZY)

    It will be a god damn miracle if I make it today NOT SMOKING

  • Anonymous

    I’m dying too…I keep trying to convince myself that the patch is working! Today is actually a little easier than yesterday, now I’m freaking myself out just waiting for my freak out! Does this make sense to you?


  • meleah rebeccah


    OMG yes!!


    Oh and I have the ADDED pleasure of PMS and a new producer / salesman in my office that DOES NOT KNOW what he’s doing and DRIVING me CRAZY

    If I make it today, it will be a FREEEKING Miracle!!

  • Anonymous

    I got my period yesterday, I TOTALLY know where you’re coming from. My husband actually said to me yesterday “why don’t you go smoke!” and then we both laughed…I explained to him that it is the PMS making me cranky, not the lack of smoking and then explained to him that this was HIS fault for not getting me pregnant…ha ha ha, poor guy.

    It is getting easier for me actually…the death cramps and the stomach bug that I have are keeping me sick enough that I don’t want to smoke. Have a sore throat now, not sure if it is from throwing up or not smoking, time will tell. Day 5 though….wahoo.


    P.S. I am too tired and sick to freak out about wondering when I’m going to freak out

  • meleah rebeccah

    ha ha ha ha!! Your husband is funny!

    Um yeah PMS is a nightmare with smoking, with out smoking its JILLIONMILLIONBILLON times WORSE!!

    I heard the sore throat, cough, runny nose ect are all HEALING from smoking symptoms…. who knows? Its also January and 65 degrees!!! That may fuck with one’s body as well!!

    hang in there!!

    I took a XANAX to stop freaking out about when I was going to freak out!

  • Anonymous

    We’ve decided to do it differently this time. Instead
    of going cold turkey, we are using the commit
    lozenges. We take 9 – 20 lozenges a day for 12 weeks.
    The first eight weeks, we can use the 4mg lozenges,
    and the move down to the 2mg ones for the remainder.
    So far, so good. I have had very few mood swings, and
    the lozenge prevents me from eating, and supresses my
    oral fixation cravings. It did give me the shits for
    the first two days, but I’m all good now. After
    dinner is still really hard too. That’s when I eat at
    least two or three pieces of candy. It’s fucking hard
    to fall aslepp too.

    Anyway, keep it up, and tell everyone that offers you
    advice to fuck off.


  • meleah rebeccah


    YOU MADE MY DAY with

    “Anyway, keep it up, and tell everyone that offers you
    advice to fuck off.”


  • Anonymous

    At your service my dear. 😉 Also remember that a lot of times the need for
    a ciggie really means you’re thirsty. So, grab a glass of water and chug a
    lug when a nic fit hits. Chewing on ice cubes also works.


  • meleah rebeccah





  • Anonymous

    Too funny. My husband is funny! He is 40, from Dublin, Ireland and has smoked over a pack a day for more than half his life the poor guy. He’s really doing well now too, soooo proud of him! I bought him lollipops and gum and loads of patches, which are totally helping.

    Me on the otherhand, I’m 36, smoked a little less or a pack a day for the last 20 years, I’m ok now I think…I’m sure I’ll wig out and want to smoke soon though, one minute at a time is my new motto.

    Luckily I’m VERY busy at work, that is really helping.

    My neighbor came by yesterday and had just smoked, I couldn’t wait to get her out of my apt because she smelled SO bad, it actually grossed me out! That’s a good sign I’m thinking. I can’t believe I walked around smelly for so long!


  • meleah rebeccah

    Oh you are LUCKY it smells BAD to you… I still like the smell …boo

    I love me an IRISH man, and you have the AUTHENTIC! (lucky!!)

    By the by…Lollipops – GUM – and even plastic pen caps (when in a pinch) are helpful!!

    Ice chips are the BEST so far… chewing ICE, you get the water and the crunch, and the oral fixation,

    now If I could only figure out what to do with my HANDS!! (insert sexual joke here)

    I guess thats why I have become such the typist lately (keeping my fingers moving!)

    PS– good motto!! I may hijack that one for myself!

  • Anonymous

    Yup…he’s authentic! We have been together for years and years and I still can’t figure out if he is actually funny or if the silly accent just makes him appear funny! Ha ha

    Lucky I’m so busy at work typing and doing other stuff that my hands are busy. I haven’t chewed on pen caps though…the germs that may possibly dwell there gross me out and I have severe “flu fear” so that won’t be happening.

    I am following south beach diet with my boss so I don’t gain weight during this quest to be a non-smoker, so lollipops are out…I don’t want to eat the sugar free ones either because they make me fart.

    I am just sucking down bottles and bottles and bottles of water, its helping.

    Ugh, I hate not smoking.


  • meleah rebeccah

    Well I love accents I’m sure your husband is funny, but that accent is a BONUS!

    Cograts on 4 years of marriage, I can’t stand the same person for longer than six months (it’s another one of my MANY charming “issues!”)

    I was SCARED to quit too because of WEIGHT GAIN

    I am the MOST VAIN person ALIVE

    (anyone who spends 20,000 on plastic surgey clearly has self esteeem / VAINITY problems)

    I have been good about not gorging myself to death. I know if I start to eat too much, I will just start smoking again…. So, its water and plain grilled chicken for me

    also the ICE CUBES replace POTATO chips!!!

    I HATE NOT SMOKING TOO!!! But, I am believing everyone when they say in a few months I will LOVE NOT SMOKING… (fingers crossed!)

  • Anonymous

    Holy crap…I just looked at your blog and I think I peed a little I laughed so hard! LOVE the mailing label! THAT IS SO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I just showed people at work, I think they peed a little too.

    Did you put lotion on? That will do it. Mine is stuck on and I have little glue squares all over my arms because I’m too frustrated or lazy to actually get them off. I am thinking of going at it with some nailpolish remover this evening, not sure though, I kinda like the look, it reminds me just how long I’ve gone without smoking.

  • meleah rebeccah


    I WRITE EVERY DAY… I have to JOKE, make light of things (that’s my way of “coping”)

    My blog is my FAVORITE thing to do… MY NEW VICE

    and I am also COVERED IN GLUE from the PATCH… fuck it! Maybe some lingering glue will leave some lingering nicotine?

    No I don’t have on any lotion, I even shaved my arms because it said to put on a DRY. HAIRLESS area on the skin…

    I’m for real when I say my BODY doesn’t want me to WARE the PATCH at all!!

    Keep READING THE BLOG! It will make you “pee a little” all the time!

  • Anonymous

    Nope…I’ve been married only since July 2006! We’ve been together for years though, not sure how long, 8 maybe? Hmmm

    Yeah, I believe it that I will love not smoking eventually, like when I’m dead. Ha ha.

    You aren’t that vain, I used to work in entertainment, trust me, compared to everyone in that industry, $20k is nothing.


  • meleah rebeccah

    Thank You!!! (for not judging me!)


  • Anonymous

    Two words:

    Punk Show. Go find one now. If you can find a good speed metal
    show, then that’ll do to. Hurl yourself into the pit. Do not leave pit until show ends or your nic fit ends.


  • Anonymous

    It seems like your day is going better also…>Congrats…

    Love the Blog!

  • meleah rebeccah

    Thank you and … YES it suppose my day is getting better!!

    Just KNOWING I am getting new pills… helps me MENTALLY

  • Anonymous

    Hey there Meleah Rebeccah,
    I just wanted to say hey to you. I’ve seen you on a few posts now and like me you quit on 1/1. Stay strong this weekend. And I’ll keep checking on you if you’ll keep checking on me.



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