Yep.
I went out Saturday night On A Real Live Date.
(*gasp* heard round the Internet)
I know! I know! This is ground breaking news to most of you. Especially for my sister in law Maya, who is forever pushing me (in a good way) to Get Out There And Start Dating.
For the first time in who knows, I was genuinely nervous. I mean butterflies in my stomach, what am I going to wear, omigod, omigod, nervous.
Side Bar: [I think I was overly nervous because I recently had an epiphany of sorts. I was talking with my mother about my previous relationships with men, when it dawned on me. Mid-sentence I realized, and announced, “Holy shit…I’ve been dating ‘The Same Guy’ over and over, except with a different name! Kurtis, Kevin, Shannon (ect. ect.) have all been ‘The Same Guy’. No wonder why I keep having The Same Outcome.”]
That moment does not sound as prolific as the actual light bulb turning on above my thick skull, but this post is about my date, not about my epiphany.
Let me back up here.
I met ‘This Guy’ approximately 2 years ago while attending a function with a friend of mine. Even though I ‘liked’ him (and he ‘liked’ me) there was a roadblock preventing us from being able to form any kind of relationship beyond the collaboration of ideas for a ‘video’ production. He was already involved with someone.
[Damn.]
However, when I saw him at the same function this year, I happily discovered that he is currently single (and has been for quite some time).
[Sweet!]
From what little I knew about him, I could already tell that he was UNLIKE any other guy I have ever dated over the course of my lifetime. This date was going to be un-chartered territory for me. Thus increasing my level of freaked-out-ness.
Some of you already know I have nothing to wear to the office let alone something to wear on a date. The quest for the perfect 1st date attire began sharply at 1pm on Saturday afternoon. 72,869,451.3 outfit changes later I finally gave up and left my house at 6pm. (5 hours was enough time dedicated to searching for clothes.) I surrendered to never finding the perfect outfit, after figuring out that no matter what I was wearing, I would hate it.
So what did I wear? Well…I don’t think I fall into the 0.02% of the population that can wear ‘The Skinny Jean’ and look good in them. However, The Skinny Jean was the only pant in my closet, which fit into my favorite boots seamlessly. I sucked it up, and sucked it in, and stuffed myself into those jeans.
I showed up at the designated restaurant (early) and I waited…
And waited.
Every minute felt like an hour.
I chose to meet in a restaurant I frequent often, for security purposes. That, and I wanted the comfort of having the home field advantage. Considering the weather was terrible on Saturday night, I did not want to chance driving around in the dark, in the rain, going to a new place, and possibly getting lost. I was anxious enough. I didn’t need the added stress of not knowing where I was or trying to figure out how to get there.
When I arrived, the staff was shocked to see how I was dressed. (I usually go there in my sweat pants, or anything close to pajama like fabrics, no make up on, and my hair in a bun.) I was questioned interrogated by the staff.
“Wow. Look at you! This must be a ‘Special Occasion’.Why are you all dressed up? You look great! But why? Wait!! Are you meeting someone? Do YOU have a DATE?”
“Yes. I have a date.” I said in a small shaky crackling voice.
I gave the bartender and waiters a quick run down about The Date who was on his way. I told them that I didn’t want to seem difficult, or high maintenance, by having to order my dinner with my usual specific demands. (Thanks to crohn’s and my food allergies, eating ‘out’ is quite the challenge to find things on the menu that wont affect me negatively.) I was afraid I might come off as some bratty nuisance. I didn’t want to freak him out or scare him off when ordering a meal by acting like Meg Ryan in that scene from the movie ‘When Harry Met Sally’.
The staff was more than willing to lend a helping hand. (I think they were just as excited to see me On A Date as my sister-in-law). The staff and I sat together to derive a plan. I would be able to order something that wasn’t even on the menu. The waiter and bartended pre-arranged with the cook what to bring me that was food allergy friendly.
(Another reason I chose that location for my 1st date. They are so accommodating. A big “Thank You” goes out to the staff of the ‘KHCC’ for making me feel extremely confident during one of my insecure moments.)
Can you just imagine being on a first date, and having to ask that date to help you find the ‘Epi-pen’ somewhere inside your giant pocket book while you break out into a lovely shade of hives? Well I can. And I did not want that to happen!
Okay, back to The Date.
He as supposed to meet me at 7pm.
I looked at my watch around 7:20 and figured…maybe he is just running late.
I took my cell phone out of my coat pocket and placed it on the table to ensure hearing my phone ring in the event he was lost.
My head was racing….
Am I going to be stood up? Am I going to look like an asshole in front of everyone in the restaurant who knows I am sitting here waiting for this guy to show up?
[Insert every worst fears and doubt]
At 7:45pm, my nerves got the best of me. I broke down and text-messaged:
“On your way?”
To which I received a reply
“ETA 10 minutes”
Whew. * wipes sweat off brows *
I went outside to enjoy a smoke break in order to calm me down. Just as I was about to put the cigarette out, guess who showed up?
The Date!
“Hey! You made it…any trouble finding the place?” I said.
“Well…not really. Although it would have been a lot easier if that main road wasn’t closed…”
“Oh that’s right. I forgot about that! I’m sorry.”
We immediately laughed as he began to describe the challenging task of finding his way to my destination via GPS.
By the time we entered the restaurant all of my fears subsided and I was completely comfortable.
We sat in a cozy corner, quiet enough to hear each other talk. And boy did we talk, and talk, and talk, and talk. It was probably the best 1st date conversation I’ve ever had the pleasure of engaging.
I knew that he was adorable. I knew that he was very smart and a well-educated man. But I did not know how funny he could be. I laughed so hard at one point my cheeks actually hurt. (My face is still sore as I sit here writing this.)
Over the course of the evening I learned:
He is 40 years old (PERFECT)
He has no children (PERFECT)
He has never been married (PERFECT)
He has a great job in NYC as a super smarty technology person (PERFECT)
He is handsome (PERFECT)
He is FUNNY (which literally makes me weak In The Knees)
And
He is definitely different from any man I have ever been with. (PERFECT!!!!!)
[I cannot tell you how refreshing it was to be on a date with someone that was NOT the stereotypical Irish-Hot-Head pounding beer after beer with only two goals in mind: getting into my drawers and/or reaching the sate of complete oblivion.]
We talked, and laughed so much, I lost track of time. We ending the evening by closing the place down.
In the interest of taking things slowly (another 1st for me) I was abnormally awkward about the ‘Good-Night Kiss’.
I am a smoker. He is NOT a smoker. The last thing I wanted to do was smell or taste like ashtray. While we chatted curbside I frantically realized I had forgotten to ‘pack’ gum or mints in my purse.
FUCK!
I leaned in to give him a hug at which point I whispered in his ear, “I’d really like to give you a kiss goodnight, but I just finished a cigarette and I don’t have a remedy to defunk my breath…I don’t want to gross you out.”
To which he laughed, and presented me with Listerine strips.
I put two of them in my mouth…at once.
The firey hell that lingered on my pallet was soooo worth ‘The Ultimate Good Night Kiss’.
FINALLY.
A good night kiss (facial hair free) that would not induce ‘rug burn’…on my face.
[I loathe facial hair…with a passion.]
Yet another bonus (+10 points) for my date.
Without getting into any more specifics or graphic detail (while I have received written approval for this post, some things must remain private –for now) I can state with utmost sincerity, I had the best 1st date…EVER.
I am truly looking forward to taking things slowly, and finding out if there is something worth developing between us.
* fingers crossed *
Meleah, I am genuinely happy that your first date went so well. Normally first dates are very nerve racking to say the least. But it sounds like this one ended up great. I hope you end up with the “Happy Ending” That you deserve. And that you stay Healthy and Happy. ( Sincerely )
oh i am thrilled… it sounds as if you really enjoyed yourself,, and he did too!!! can’t wait to hear more!!!!!
Oh, I am so happy for you.
You tell a great story. Dude was ready to kiss you with smoke and all. I know that can be something to get over. I’ve been down the road with a smoker. But when you want that kiss you make things happen.
Excellent… Hope to hear about date two soon.
Certain Bald Guy AKA Danny:
THANK YOU for that comment. Given our history I was nervous / concerned about what your reaction might be. THANK YOU for being My Friend. That truly means a lot to me.
Yes 1st dates are often filled with that weirdo uncomfortable silence. In this case we would have talked the whole night long had the restaurant stayed open!
Paisley:
I will be sure to keep every one posted….But I may send you direct emails with a little more detail. (After all, you are my adopted internet ‘sister’)
Urban:
Aw. Thanks. I’m glad I told the story of the evening well. I am really hoping the smoker / non-smoker thing wont present a problem in the future as I have NO intentions on quitting.
YAY!!!! Where are the pics of you all dolled up? Too stunning to post, that I’m sure of.
Nice to hear things went well, the wait staff was accommodating and you had a great time!
YAY! I am SO happy for you! He sounds incredible. I hope this story just gets better and better for you.
Dazd:
I didnt take any photos that day. I was waaaaay to nervous. (Next Time) Actually, he took a few pictures of me that night, when he sends them to me I will revise this post to include the photos! xxoo
Terri:
He is so awesome. I just hope I don’t wear my heart on my sleeve or make any of my usual mistakes. 🙂
Woo Hoo!! Yay! He sounds like a doll. There isn’t much better than a man who looks good AND can make you laugh.
dang, even I had fun on your date. lol. sounds promising….take one day at a time and whatever you, do not see how his last names looks after yours on a paper napkin until the 3rd date. lol
okay 1 kiss on first date, not too long and no tongue until you’ve run a background check. can i say that?
enjoy and keep us posted. don’t forget to always have a good time.
I knew there was a reason I shaved my beard! 🙂
Congratulations on a successful first date! If the first one is successful it increases the chances that a second one will be equally successful. Your comments about not having anything to wear for your date made me chuckle. I think it was an old Ford Fairlane routine where he supposedly said to his date that she would look best in “nothing at all.”
Momo:
I literally Get WEAK In The Knees for FUNNY. Looks are sort of important, but not as much as a great sense of humor.
Valerie:
Ha ha ha…I am glad YOU had fun on my date! Okay got it. 3rd date practice writing his last name next to mine! hahahaha And I will be sure to run a ‘background’ check!
Lee:
Oh facial hair is just TERRIBLE. Its scratchy, itchy, and makes men look ‘dirty’ (at least in my opinion).
I can’t stand facial hair (especially when it has food crumbs in it) *gag*
Thank you for the well wishes! I have never been on such an easy 1st date. Lets hope things progress as well as date number one!
I really need to go clothes shopping!
I am bouncing up and down on the couch. My laptop is threatening to fly across the room but I don’t care because I am so delighted for you. YEE HAAAAA. You deserve every happiness, dear Meleah. Keeping everything crossed for you!
oooh, oooh, enjoy those endorphins!
Selma:
You are such a doll.
But DO NOT DROP THE APPLE!
hehehehe
xxooo
Miss Burrows:
I am indeed!
🙂
I read it.
Got up of my chair.
“Yeeeeeaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!” I screamed, laughing 🙂
I’m so happy for you!!!!!!!!!!
*Hugs* from me!!!!!!!
🙂
🙂
🙂
GO GO GO Meleah!!! 🙂
You got all the well wishes from this Mother Hen, in fact I think we all really love to see you so happy 🙂
My personal philoshophy about love is the more you expect and the more you get what you expect, the bigger the drama, the more painfull the breakup. Not trying to jinx you, but sharing my personal experience which I haven’t found a working solution to yet.
RMH:
You are so adorable. xxoo xxoo I love you! 🙂
Morgan:
I am going into this with an open mind and no preconceived expectations. Maybe you should try that?
YAY!! It sounds like an awesome night and you deserve it!! What was the .3 part of outfits that you didn’t like???? I feel like I just went on a first date, I’m so excited for you!
HOT DAMN!!! Nothing more, just HOT DAMN!!!
I with Natural Woman – I had fun on your date, TOO!!
Oh my, he sounds…. awesome. I LOVE how you described the date. Also, he’s cool for giving you the go-ahead for posting EVERYTHING. Gotta love that.
But seriously… good luck! And keep us posted!
SO HAPPY FOR YOU. We must chat on the phone SOON love!
Chef Mom:
Thank you honey! I had a GREAT TIME. Lets hope this keeps up!
CMK:
Hot Damn IS Damn Right
Jillian:
He is The Best for giving me permission to POST THIS ON THE INTERNET. I sent him the word draft FIRST with a ‘waring” and he was GAME with me sharing! Wheeeeee!
Leslie:
Expect a phone call and a private email !! xxoo xxoo
wheeww heew Meleah has a hottie..go girl if he makes you laugh like that it’s all good…enjoy young lady..
AWESOME!!! See, miracles are just around the corner…I love how you were honest with him about the kiss, and his reaction was so sweet! AWWWWW!
I’m excited for you! And a bit jealous…now I want to go out on a “good” date!
Robert:
Its a win win situation (so far)
RC:
Well, I had to be honest! I didn’t want to kiss him all smokey style.
He really is a total sweety but NOT one of those pussy push-overs either. Like the perfect balance. (At least from what I can tell so far!)
Silver:
Oh one of these days you will get to go on the perfect 1st date too. I’ve been waiting a Very Long Time for this! xxoo
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am doing my Happy Dance right here, right now!! (you know the one where I’m naked and have maraccas…THAT one)
Dooood I am so excited for you. A good first date, first kiss is the bees-knees.
This post deserves a 🙂 🙂 kudos rating. Ok, a 🙂 one for good measure!
SomeGirl:
That was some beautiful post you wrote today.
I cannot tell you how HAPPY that made me.
Thanks for your unbridled enthusiasm. I just love it when you are naked and holding maraccas. xxoo
Rog:
*high fives*
…oh, thank you. You don’t know how happy it made ME to write it. I haven’t felt this AWAKE and focused in months. It feels good…
Enjoy the ride…
Wheee!! Where to begin… Well, first of all, an epiphany like the one you had is a really big deal. When you recognize a pattern like that, it makes is SOOO much easier to choose differently next time.
And it looks like you have. What a terrific first date. You deserve soooo much more than what you’ve had, and I think you’re realizing that now. Which is why your attracting – and attracted to – such a different sort.
Oh, I cannot WAIT to watch/hear/read this unfold. xoxo
if Danny is Certain Bald Guy why is he CGB & not CBG?????
I loved reading about your first date 🙂
I’ve been waiting all day to get home from work and read your blog! Sounds like a great time, I am so happy for you. Dang, it makes me want a date! And I know all about dating “the same guy” over and over.
When is your second date? He sounds WONDERFUL.
Some Girl:
Thats a RELIEF
HollyGL:
Ah Yes! There is my favorite die hard hopeless romantic! That epiphany really was a BIG Deal. I am just as excited to see where this leads. xxoo
Fanny! My Love!
Ha ha ha …I guess he put the initials in wrong when he left that comment! xxoo
Jen Weaver!
You are a such a doll. I cant wait to have a Photo Shoot with you! (although my date was with a Fo-Tog!) Thanks for dropping by my blog. Hope to see more of you. 🙂
Barbara:
You are too cute. Ugh. I am so over THE SAME GUY. This New Guy is wonderful. I am not sure when we will get to have our second date…next weekend I am totally Jammed up. Its Mothers day Sunday and my son’s 12th birthday Saturday. *gasp* I am going to be one very busy woman. Hopefully we can get together again soon. I cant take waiting tooo long! xxoo
I have not had a first date in so long that your story was fun to read … and to remember what they were like.
The Irish drinkin` panty guy??? LOL! I like how you phrase your sentences with KEY words. Very nice.
I hate beards too. (J/K) *wink*
Sounds like a great start to something / someone with real potential. Good for you Meleah. Now I need a smoke ….. that one last vice.
Speedy
WAY. TO. GO!!! And, I’m glad he’s funny. I’m assuming he likes 30 Rock?
😉
Speedy:
You may the exception to the No Facial Hair rule!
And…I am so sick of the Irish Panty guy!
(but, again….except for you)
Most first dates are NOT this much fun. I think I lucked out.
I do not envision me ever giving up the smoking vice. I am going to have to work something out with that whole situation.
Michael C:
Would you believe me? If I told you he DOES NOT WATCH TELEVISION at all.
That might be the biggest obstacle. After all I am a self proclaimed TV Junkie.But other than that? (and the smoking thing…) Hopefully this will be a new and fun experience for me!!
Wow… sounds like an amazing date… good on you Meleah…
keep it going… touchwood…
Wish you all the best and a big thanks for sharing with us.
Cheers…
Woohoo Meleah, way to go 😀 I’m happy for ya. Looks like you had a marvelous date. Here’s looking to hearing more from you 🙂
I just had a thought. The best way to deal with that breath problem from smoking is to stop smoking!!!! 😀 I suspect that you may find some other health issues would improve as well. Having smoked for over 30 years, I know how hard it is to stop. And yes, what they say about ex-smokers being a pain in the butt is true!!
Arv:
It was truly amazing to feel that comfortable on a first date!
Nick:
Thanks darling. So far so good. Hope my 2nd date its just as wonderful as the 1st!
Lee:
I tried quitting two times, with AWFUL results and everyone in my life suffered the consequences. Somewhere around this blog you can search for those posts. I joined an Internet support group, used the patch, the gum, the mints, and even chantix. (yeah there are at least 45 posts dedicated to my struggle and ultimate failure)
The problem is…. I dont WANT to quit. I have taken the position and mind set, that I have given UP enough in my life…(just the foods alone I’ve had to eliminate as a result of food allergies and crohn’s) I can’t bring myself to Give Up one more thing that I love So Very Much.
Ill make a deal with you. When and IF I can ever eat BREAD (again), or a bowl of mashed potatoes, or tomato sauce, or pasta, or corn, or broccoli, (and the list goes on) MAYBE…MAYBE Ill consider the IDEA of quitting smoking.
I planned on the smoking “quit” years ago too. I think the want to and ready to are key as well.
Love your reply … my curiosity just had to see! I have dated women that did not like facial hair in the past – so off it came. Current Mrs Speedcat likes beards, so why not? Much easier in the morning as well, because I am always too late to shave anyhoo.
So … when is the part 2 published?
Happy day!
Speedy
Sounds like a good one. I’m so glad t went well for you.
I happen to like the taste of ash tray mouth but I might be a little weird 😉
Conrats on your first date 😀 it is such good news and you deserve to be sooo happy!!! I am so pleased that it went well, it sounds like it was a wonderful time. He’s a very very lucky man… and I hope you reminded him of that…LOL!!!
I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you!
Warm wishes and big hugs ~ Graham xx
ps. Sorry I haven’t been blogging much of late, have been a lil “unwell”. Am trying to cheer myself up now and should be posting like crazy again soon 🙂
Speedy:
No one can quit if you dont WANT TO and just because I went on One Date, I am not prepared to rearrange my whole existence! 🙂
I will keep everyone updated …. we have been having a lovely exchange of emails and text messages. Will see when we can set up date #2!
Hammer:
Twas indeed. LOL “I happen to like the taste of ash tray mouth” Me too.
Graham:
Oh No! I am so sorry to hear you arent feeling well. I was wondering where you went! Thanks for the kind words and I am wishing you get well soon! xxoo xxoo
Sounds wonderful, Meleah! I am very happy for you.
I totally agree that a man with no kids who has never been married is a perfect prospect. I found myself one of those and our family life is so much easier because Gabe does not have that kind of baggage.
I remember my first date. I was a real bag of nerves, with sweaty palms and heart palpitations. Thankfully, the chloroform worked a treat and I had a whale of a time!
Ingrid:
It was WONDERFUL….and Oh Hell Yes. I made a GOOD CHOICE with a PERFECT prospect! xxooo xxooo
Qelqoth:
Well, since I dont really know you, I am not sure if I am supposed to laugh at that comment, or be afraid… Ill go with laughing!
Good for you!!